Dee's Diary

I've MOOOOOOVED!!!

2006-03-09T10:10:00.000-08:00

All that whining and cussing paid off, folks! I've mostly figured out WordPress and you can now find your favorite whining cow over at:

http://www.deetenorio.com/Blog/

The front of the site is built as well and I'll be adding to that as we go! Come check out the new digs!!

Consider me...launching!
Smooches,
Dee

Scratching Head...

2006-03-08T11:03:00.000-08:00

So, okay, I finally got my own web domain. :) Which is exciting! But, I prolly won't get it all transferred over until this weekend. So, I thought I'd look to see about adding wordpress and doing my own blog on my own site.

Who knew Wordpress was such a pain in the ass?

So, after much annoyance getting my blog formatted mostly the way I want it, I discovered that my "categories" don't really seem to work. I can make them...I just can't use them. Wordpress seems to be another one of those programs that requires you to find a template so that you don't actually know what's going on. Want a new function? Get a plug-in. Everything is on a separate page.... sigh.

What do y'all think? Is it smart to change my blog? My website, yes, but should I just keep going on this one?

Smooches,
Dee

TTT: Learning To Adventure

2006-03-06T21:33:00.000-08:00

Welcome back to the second part of the my Hero’s Journey rundown. As before, we’ll be using quotations from Vogler’s “The Writer’s Journey”. :) This week, we’re going to cover the first very large section, wisely titled “The Call To Adventure”.

When we last left your hero, they were in their “Ordinary World”. Things are the way they have pretty much always been. Think of Harry Potter at the Dursley’s. He’s unhappy, they like him unhappy. Such is life.

But the whole purpose of a story is to take your hero--and thus your readers--on an adventure. Take them out of their regular existence and widen their horizons. That widening, in effect, will change how your hero will see the world and the way it works. And, inevitably, the hero will come home again and realized that the things that were once so big and daunting don’t have the power they once had. But, that’s me getting ahead of myself.

First, the hero must hear the call in the first place. This is very simple to do. Introduce your plot. Evil overtaking the universe? War going on overseas? There’s some hairy chick in a tower, begging for help? Those are all clarion calls. Something is happening somewhere and the hero hears about it. They don’t have to care yet, but they do have to hear about it.

So, you’d think that it would be a simple “Sure, I’ll come!” (they are heroes, after all!), but when’s the last time you met someone who threw themselves into drastic change without a drop of hesitation?

Yeah, not too often.

Most heroes are going to drag their heels just a wee bit. They’re not stupid, the have no reason to go flinging themselves into the unknown when the currently known is safe enough, thanks. This is the period referred to as the “Refusal Of The Call”.

A few things can happen here to jumpstart your hero whether they like it or not. The adventure is coming, and heroes do not get the luxury of saying no.

1) A hero can jump right in--sick and tired of their current existence, or (more commonly) facing death, they’ll take any other option. (Brendan Frasier in the Mummy.)

2) They will meet what is called a “Threshold Guardian”: "Heroes who overcome their fear & commit to the adventure may stll be tested by powerful figures who raise the banner of fear & doubt, questioning hero's worthiness to be in the game."

Few things will inspire a hero like a thrown down gauntlet. They have no desire to join the adventure, but damn if they’re going to be mocked for not joining the adventure. Examples of Threshold Guardians would be, perhaps, Robert Loggia’s role as Richard Gere’s father in “Officer & A Gentleman”, telling him that he can never be an officer.

Ultimately, a Threshold Guardian is simply whatever is the obstacle between you and your hero taking that first step into the adventure. It can be a person, a fear, a place or a thing. Often, the first guardian is not the strongest your hero will encounter--you know, they gotta practice on something.

3) The Secret Door can happen. Often times, heroes get themselves into a mess of trouble based purely on their own curiosity. "Heroes inevitably violate limits set by Mentors or Threshold Guardians, due to what we...call the Law Of The Secret Door." ie: Belle & West Wing, Pandora & box..."...the powerful drive to know all the hidden things, all the secrets."

Any of these three can be the way to push your hero toward their adventure, usually despite their better judgement. Thankfully, there are guides to the adventure. Someone who knows what they’re doing a little bit better than our newbie heroes. These are called “Mentors” and the next section of the Call is “Meeting With The Mentor”.

Once your hero begins listening to the advice of the more knowledgeable soul, they begin accepting that the adventure is part of their destiny. Expressing this turn, this overcoming of their reluctance, can be done by learning a few things from their mentors--even accepting gifts (Obi Wan Kenobi handing Luke his father’s lightsaber, anyone?)--that can bring some excitement to the call. Basically, your hero wants to know what they’re going to get out of it and a Mentor is usually there to tell them.

Be careful, though, when creating your mentor. Just about everyone pictures the same old guy in white hair with a beard, using his trusty walking stick as he staggers his way across the story, berating his young, useless apprentice. But mentors can come in all shapes and sizes. Peter Pan was a mentor, when showing Wendy how to fly and how to enjoy Neverland. And, mentors are people too, with their own agendas. A mentor can just as easily be the father your hero never had...or the villain in disguise. Ask yourself what kind of mentor your hero has and how have you turned the archtype on it’s head.

Now, once your hero has begun to accept his fate to start the adventure, has taken a step towards it and learned a few things about how to go about it, they must “Cross The First Threshold” and commit to the change.

But, young paduwan, we’ll cover that next week!

Happy Friday!!

2006-03-03T14:08:00.000-08:00

I know, blogging late again. Sorry about that!

So, I've just finished editing the first half of the WIP. The one I was lamenting single title status? Well, it's still going to be over 60k easily, but I doubt it's going to hit the 100k I was stressing out about. Once I managed to work in all the fixes and goals and proper stuff to the first three chapters, the next three came fairly easily. The book is now a solid 36k completed. Since I have only a few weeks until it's due, I'm pretty sure I can shape the rest in time. I told hubby to get good and comfy in the shabby shape of the house until this book--and any possible surgery--are complete. :)

You gotta love a man who doesn't bat an eye when he agrees to such statements.

So, I'm prepared for a weekend of hitting the book with both paws. :)
What are your weekend plans?
Dee

Lazy Day...

2006-03-02T09:26:00.000-08:00

Yes, I'm going to be bad.

Yesterday, I did a quiz to wake myself up. It was about checking on your inner child. Apparently, according to them, my inner child is ANGRY. (She seemed perfectly fine to me, lol, maybe a wee bit cynical, but come on, seriously??), then I realized that would make a lousy post. I mean, do I WANT to look insane? (Well, more than usual?)

So, anyway, my old boss saves me with a really interesting writing challenge:

"A college class was told to write a very short story in as few words as possible. The instructions were:

The story must contain the following things:

1) Religion
2) Sexuality
3) Mystery"

I challenge y'all to give it a shot! The only A+ answer will be posted in the comments. :)
Lemme see what y'all got!

TTT: Not So Ordinary World

2006-02-27T22:57:00.000-08:00

How many of you have heard of the Hero’s Journey? And how many of you have made much sense of it?

Yup, that’s about how it goes for everyone. I’m not a particularly deep cookie sheet, so it took me a bit of time to understand how the Hero’s Journey could change my writing. Did it only apply to heroes? What could it really do for me? And why, sweet lord, was everyone talking about it?

Between you and me, it’s because it’s very worth talking about. (And reading. If you get a chance, pick up the book “The Writer’s Journey” by Christopher Vogler. Brilliant book that made it simpler for this cookie sheet to make some better cookies!)

And also between you and me, I’m going to be dedicating my TTT for the next several weeks to help you break it down and see if it helps all of us with our WIPS!

The Hero’s Journey has many stages that can help you develop your character arcs, arrange your story into acts and help you build a pace. The most important way thing to remember is that for your characters, in their own minds, they are their own hero. So, you can use this Journey to guide your heroes, heroines, villains and even secondary characters.

As we work our way though this series, I will be using quotes from the book listed above to ask questions and give guide instructions. And, of course, I’ll be adding my own hopefully helpful tips and explanations.

The very first stage of the Hero’s Journey is what is commonly called “The Ordinary World”. This is because you always want to show where the hero is from, what is the world as he knows it.

Things are about to happen that will send your hero on an adventure, be it a love adventure, a physical adventure or a mystery adventure. Something will happen to the hero in question to change them from the world they knew to an experience they’ve never known, possibly even never wanted. Ultimately, this adventure is going to change them. A hero that has not changed at the end of your book simply has not finished their adventure. You cannot come out of an adventure without becoming different in some way.

In order for your reader to understand how drastic those changes are, you need to first show them where the hero feels comfortable, the world they know. Then begin working your way through the functions of the Ordinary World--afterall, we’re showing it for a reason :)--and try to incorporate these within your first chapter.

• Raise The Dramatic Question: Give your hero something for the reader to be concerned about. "Will she achieve the goal, overcome flaw, learn lesson needing learned? Dramatic questions hook audience & involve them with the emotions of the character."

This section is where you introduce the Internal and External Conflicts, usually they are what create your Dramatic Question. Don’t be afraid to simply lay out what your hero’s problems are. But how do you go about creating the question? Here’s some more functions to look for to see if you’re getting enough done at the very beginning of your story.

• Make An Entrance: When you first introduce your hero, they should be seen in a way that best shows who the character is, deep down, in the world as they know it. "The first action should be a model of the hero's characteristic attitude & future probs or solution that will result. The 1st behavior should define & reveal character, unless intent is to mislead & conceal true nature.”

What this means is that you should show the hero the way you want the reader to think of him or her. Create a first impression. Remember the movie “Tombstone”? The first time we see Wyatt Earp, he’s happy and looking pleased with himself...until he sees a workman whipping a horse. He takes the whip in hand and wallops the workman saying, “Hurts, doesn’t it?” Immediately we are shown that he’s a man who is excited about his future, fair, if rough, and decent at his core. We’re going to need that impression to sustain us as he begins doing things that aren’t so fair and decent, and it does it’s job. We are now interested enough to follow him whereever he leads, convinced of his inner goodness.

• Introducing The Hero: Like a social intro, establish a bond between reader & hero, commonalities so they can relate to him.

Again, using a movie reference, when you introduce a character, you’ll want to immediately prove to your reader that we’re following someone they’d like to make friends with. The character can be cranky, quirky, goofy or even rude, but they should have something a reader and empathize with. “Terms Of Endearment” begins with the heroine deathly concerned that her child isn’t safe in her crib, filled with first mother anxiety. We relate to that urge to protect, that sense that if we stay by their bed all night long, we can keep the child safe and alive. We probably wouldn’t pinch the kid until she cries and leave satisfied, but the writer’s job was already done. We related.

Establish What's At Stake: What does the hero stand to gain or lose in the adventure?

This is a highly important question. If they just go running around for the hell of it, why do we care? You’d think they were idiots and not waste your time. Most things in life have a price. Every story you ever read is simply a tale of what price people are willing to pay for their heart’s desire. Show what a hero can lose if they take the adventure and here’s a very special tip--make sure it’s outweighed by what they can gain. Heavily outweighed.

There are also certain facts that are needed to be shown in The Ordinary World. Information you must impart with your reader.

1) Backstory & Exposition: Backstory: facts that explain what got the hero HERE. Exposition: graceful--preferably slow--revelation of the back story and pertinent plot facts; explanation of all aspects of plot pressures.

Backstory can be a few lines or even a flashback. I’m of the “few lines” school of thought myself, but what’s important is why your hero feels this Ordinary World is home. Show us why they have a level of comfort here. Now, by comfort, I don’t mean that Cinderella particularly enjoys sleeping in the fireplace. I mean, she knows the ins and outs of her world. She knows that if she wakes up early and cleans all day long, she stands a pretty good chance of not getting beaten. Why wouldn’t she leave that world at the drop of a hat? Because she doesn’t know that doing everything she’s told will increase her odds of getting through each day if she goes anywhere else. A rat in a trap may not want to die, but it knows the current danger. Setting it free can get you bitten because you are the Unknown and nothing in the world is scarier than that.

2) Theme: State it HERE. "If you had to boil down it's essence in a single word or phrase, what would it be?"--ie: "Love conquers All"

Ever write a thesis in your high school essays? That line you’re trying to prove at the bottom of your first paragraph? Something in there that says “This is the way things are” and you go on to present concrete details that show you’re right? Believe it or not, you should have one for your story. It doesn’t have to be epic, but it can be the thread you come back to when you can’t find your center and your characters seem to be aimlessly wandering around. Find a way to place what you’d like to show your reader somewhere early in your book. First chapter, most preferably. In fact, if you can fit all of this in chapter one, you’re definitely on the right page.

Next Week: The Call To Adventure!

Morning Report!

2006-02-27T10:04:00.000-08:00

Well, a lot of stuff I wanted to get done on the weekend didn't get done...but other, more valuable things did, so that's okay. One of those things was finally hanging some stuff up that didn't fit in my closet. This was achieved by completely rearranging my closet. And a good portion of my bedroom. And I'm not done.

Other things that got done were some cross-platform fixing of my website. Rae--helpful PC spy for me--informed me that my grand attempt at revamping my site had failed miserably on PC. Pet's computer arrived and we were able to take a look. It should now work reasonably well for all viewers. Interestingly, I learned that on a PC, you see Yahoo ads when you go to my site (thus the whole "free" site aspect). I didn't know about that as my Mac doesn't see them, lol. But don't worry, resizing shouldn't be a problem there, either, anymore. Sooner or later, I will master the whole em line sizing and so on, but until then, HTML will have to handle it. It's not exactly perfect on all points for PCs, nor is it exactly perfect for Macs, but as long as it's slightly--but equally flawed--and still useable, lol, it wiill work for now. I also created an author newsletter for my future releases. There's nothing to it at this point, but I'm hoping soon I can use it to let people know when the book will be out and so on. It's another important step is all. :)

Most importantly, the taxes were completed, filed and accepted. PHEW! I figure you can only go over them so many times before admitting that it's all as done and complete and correct as you can do it. I'm just glad it's out of the way. :) Now I can concentrate on other things, like writing, work and putting my house together. It feels like a good week for me, so I'm going to get done what I can and try not to sweat the small stuff...like that load of laundry I never quite get done. And dammit, I'm vacuuming today and no one is going to stop me!

Many smooches!
Dee

Holy Conflict, Batman!

2006-02-25T11:50:00.000-08:00

So, late last night, my CP and I were considering what was wrong with my current WIP. Basically, it's boring as hell. I mean, I like everyone. And there's a definite pull. But the current plot is not holding up the fat ass on this puppy, and I say that with love. It's just not doing it. If ever a book needed and ass bra, this is it.

Thankfully, my CP had one or two handy and we're back in business. (You know, when I stop procrastinating and actually get back to working on it.) Alas, the more I work on it, the more I realize that this book is really a Single Title. Not an epic or anything, but there is a lot of weaving to be done and all of it actually DOES need to be in there, and 60k just ain't going to cut it. This is a Single Title.

But I'm not ready!

At least, I'm not sure I am. Most of my story ideas are big like this, but--as I lamented to another CP--I haven't written a big book in years. Not one that made any sense, anyway. When I was a kid and writing was easy (you know, when I didn't know what the hell I was doing as opposed to now, when I REALLY don't know what the hell I'm doing). And I admit it, I'm scared. Single Titles are a dream I felt I had to grow into and I've been writing for a really damn long time, always telling myself I'm not ready. But, this puppy is contracted and the story has to go this way. So, ready or not, here I come.

BUT, before I do, I'm going to post the conversation with Lorie here for a good laugh and a little encouragement. Read it through, because it's funny, and see if you can take on the challenge at the bottom!

Dee says: I stayed up really late last night with X trying to figure out how to fix Sky's pacing. Dumb-ass has gone and made himself more Single Title than I expected. Wondering if I shouldn't go for the whole shebang

Lorie says: why not?

Dee says: well, I've never written a full size single title. At least, not on purpose. My endless childhood tomes really don't count, they had no craft.

Lorie says: right, although, you know, following the craft rules too closely can lead to lessening of voice

Dee says: lol, these were bad. When I say craft, I mean they were devoid of any kind of skill, possibly even talent, lol, they were BAD

Lorie says: ah

Dee says: Perfect example, my book "Faith": epic tale of a woman who escapes her sociopathic husband only to bring death whereever she hides as he follows her. oh, and every man who meets her falls in love with her

Lorie says: which knowing what you know now you could actually work with without making it all .. formula

Dee says: did I mention she's just short of catatonic for the first part of the story?

Lorie says: lol

Dee says: oh, lol, this has just begun! that part would almost make sense

Lorie says: lol

Dee says: so, her lawyer, who was the first born "legitimate" son of a massively rich man, decides to take her to his father's mansion to hide and recover. she doesn't really do more than blink a few times here

Lorie says: lol

Dee says: when she arrives, she's now thrown into the mix of the lawyer's convoluted family situation

Lorie says: lol of course

Dee says: Dad, from Ireland, apparently was torn from who true love--who is now his maid--and married a harridan of his father's choosing. oh, and she has a gorgeous son of her own...by that Dad, who, upon seeing Catatonic Chick, claims her for his own

Lorie says: lol, a real web huh

Dee says: and begins another battle with lawyer dude--who's ex-wife, btw, once had an affair with Hot Illegitimate, Oh, and did you know she's pregnant? With a heart condition! Oh MY!

Lorie says: lol, holy conflict batman!

Dee says: Catatonic Chick awakens under loving ministrations of Hot Illegitimate's warm brogue and rejects overtures of Lawyer Dude, which displeases Evil Harridan, who connects (Miraculously) with Evil Socio Hubby to make a deal to get back at Catatonic Chick

Lorie says: catatonic chick alone is too much sometimes... although, hot illegitamte's warm brogue stirs interest

Dee says: I'm pretty sure Evil Hubby kills Evil Harridan (and she LIKES it!) before attacking Hot Illegitimate, who has finally come to terms with Lawyer dude after Ho-Wife dies giving birth to Lawyer-Dude's baby (despite having aborted Hot Illegitimate's)

Dee says: I think, right about then, Catatonic Chick wakes up and finally connects with her hidden Weather Control abilities and runs out to the cliffs to draw Evil Hubby to his death by hitting him with lightening and tossing him into the sea far, far, far below where his body is never recovered and though she marries Hot Illegitimate (who's parents finally marry after Evil Harridan is dead), she never stops looking over her shoulder, sure that someone is watching...and waiting...

Lorie says: lol of course, lawyer dude

Dee says: oh, Lawyer Dude raises his daughter in peace--he never gets any ever again

Lorie says: lol

Dee says: I forgot what happens to "Completely Unnecessary and Oblivious" Sister, though

Lorie says: lol

Dee says: I'm pretty sure she gets raped and tries to steal Catatonic Chick's schtick

Dee says: the bitch

Lorie says: lol

Dee says: I dare anyone to have MORE conflict and less plot than THAT book!

Now, Lorie says she had a horrid Sci-Fi that could rival the terrifying cheesy smell of the above stinker. Bring me your worst, your smelliest, your over-erotic, your under-plot developed! See who might have the worst possible, actually somewhat written book hiding under their bed, from any age and I will offer you a cool graphic for your blog to tout as Queen Of Cheese for a Week!

To Call 911...or not...

2006-02-24T14:09:00.000-08:00

So, I have this slightly annoying neighbor. I've never seen him. I have no idea what he looks like or which front door is his. I have no idea what his name is. And I doubt I ever will. But still, he features in today's blog because of a very interesting event last night.

So, it's late. Just about to go to bed, check my email. Remember my boss, the one with the funny jokes? Well, he sent me to a maze. I like puzzles and so I'm thinking, okay, I'll do that real quick and go to sleep. You're supposed to manuever the maze and not touch the walls. I get through almost all the way through the third page. I'm about to make it, but I touch...

AND BAM!!

Full screen image of The Exorcist screaming like a banshee.

Now, Linda Blair doesn't scare me. But I didn't realize my laptop had mysteriously been pushed to full volume. And I didn't realize it was Linda Blair. I thought it was the wrinkly witch from The Ring, who incidentally DOES scare the shit out of me. So, of course, I scream. LOUD. I jump back so hard I nearly knocked hubby off the bed, which sets him yelling, "OMG, what's wrong? What happened? What's wrong with the baby?" (Moo reverts to the "baby" when hubby is half asleep) I hit the screen on my laptop and I'm desperately trying to hit Command+Q to quit and shut the program down. Finally get it done and by this time there has been at least three minutes of seriously loud screaming.

Note my neighbor, outside my window, who is loudly on the phone after midnight.

Does he ask if everyone is okay? Does he come over to knock on the door? Does he call 911 to report mysterious screams in the night followed by eerie silence?

Nope.

He waits ten minutes to make sure I'm not going to disturb his phone call again,then gets back to business.

There's not a lot of point to this post, lol, but seriously, wouldn't YOU at least call out to make sure people don't need help? I mean, he HAS a phone.

Or is it just me?

Husbands

2006-02-23T13:04:00.000-08:00

I think part of the reason I enjoy writing romance is because my husband makes such a great character. He's manly, he's artistic, he's caring, occasionally he's thick as a brick. He's funny and he's romantic. He's annoying. He's cute. I love his feet, not because they're pretty, but because they have so much personality. I love how he cooks and that he doesn't mind that I snitch off his plate--he makes extra because he knows I will. I love when he knows to hold me. I don't love that sometimes he doesn't. He's a very real guy with layers and problems and issues. I think a lot of my heroes are based on him, or at least, the reality of him.

I wonder if he were not so good to me if I would be so enamored of romance. Would I be bitter because I hadn't found some fairy-tale guy who can overcome all with the flick of a page? Or would I just be lonely looking for one? I know for a fact I wouldn't be writing them--my hubby is the one responsible for my continued writing and submitting. I never would have bothered without him. (That's not romantic, he was yelling at the time, lol.)

I know single women write romance. Shoot, I know men write romance. But I do often wonder if my husband makes my heroes work out because he provides a level of reality that I have to include. I have no illusions of men without a rough edge or two. Couldn't write one if I wanted to. And I really don't.

So the question of the day is mostly this: Do the men in your life shape your imaginary heroes too?

Every Now & Then...

2006-02-22T07:21:00.000-08:00

Something goes right with the world!

Go check in on Larissa Ione and congratulate her! Girlfriend just sold to Red Sage's "Secrets" series!!! Way To Go, Larissa!

EDITED:

Okay, I'm lazy. One, I don't want to blog again, but more importantly, I don't want to push Larissa's great news down the blog page or it'll get missed. That one sounds highly noble, so I'll stick with that. :) (But seriously, SOOOO happy for Larissa!)

So, I did several blog stops this morning as I attempted to wake up and make sense. Moo has been on a psuedo-vacation all week and finally goes back to school tomorrow. I am miraculously feeling pretty good but as you can imagine, no writing has really taken place. It just doesn't happen amidst all the mommy-mommying. And that's okay. I've had a lot of stirring ideas and thoughts and I imagine I'll be able to hit the pages hard tomorrow.

Today, we're going out with Moo's best friend to give them some playtime so us Moms can get a little breathing room. This is new to me. I've never done the play-date thing. This sucks for Moo, I know, but what is so commonplace these days is laughably ridiculous to the previous era of childrearing. You know, the one my mom raised me in? Her idea of a playdate was locking the kids outside so they'd play and she could clean the house without interruption. We were only allowed to come in to pee. Grudgingly. Then again, there were six of us. And we had a yard. And a neighborhood of kids to play with. Moo has no sibs, no yard and no neighborhood.

Hello, have we met? I am Crappy Mommy.

So, I am about to get over my fear of crowds and people who I don't know and wander out with my more-socially-adept-than-me autistic child into the land of Play Dates.

God have mercy on my soul.

(I'll let y'all know how it goes!)
Dee

Not A Teach Day...YET!

2006-02-21T08:40:00.000-08:00

But I have made a good start on one of my other goals. I've made a committment to do a project or two for Romance Junkies, which I'll post about when I have it set. Suffice it to say, I'm very excited and glad that Cat has the opportunity available!

I'm hoping to get teach day restarted next week but for now, I'll be working on my other goal of writing and working. Then it's tax time. Those things WILL get done, daggnabbit.

A friend at eHQ, during a really great craft discussion on the Writing Blaze page said something particularly stirring about keeping the story from lagging and maintaining the tension by working on the characters fears. It's not something new--Internal conflict, "Trample, Trample, Trample" after all--but it's something I deeply needed reminding of. They're doing some writing exercises and some Golden Hearts valuing, lol. (I'd comment, but as I don't do contests for the very reasons they're mulling, I'm not really a voice of any knowledge.) Might be worth peeking in for you.

As for me, I'll head over there a bit later. I'm going to go poke my hero in the eyes a few times. :)

Smooches,
Dee

BlogSlap!

2006-02-20T08:15:00.000-08:00

I'm tired of myself. I really am. Since the move, particularly, I've managed to whine, complain, explain and maintain a blog filled with pretty much no value whatsoever.

I woke up the other day and realized, I need a blogslap. I need to focus my blog, my writing, my life and my work. Now. No meandering here, meandering there. I need to get back to Tuesday Teach Days because, dammit, I need to start learning again. I need to plan out exactly how my future PR plans must roll out to give my book the best chance and show my publisher that I'm willing to work to make it a success. I need to get my ear back to the railroad and pay attention to the Industry. I need to widen my scope and approach the world I'm hoping to become known in like it's a battle plan, not a walk in the park.

So, I need to set some goals.

1) Finish the fricken taxes. Our refund is going to go a long way toward my goals of paying for my website and RWA registration, which I deeply want this year. (I want a pink ribbon, I want to fantisize about RITA noms someday, so I need to get into position.) I want to take my boy to Disneyland.

2) Finish the fricken book. I'm halfway and I've made a lot of progress. There is no reason to slow down now.

3) Work out a daily schedule. Each day of the week needs to be given a number of duties including days for specific modes--Website work, Scheduling, PR development, Fresh Proposals--and each weekday must include a minimum of 2 hours writing time. It must also include blog reading, as this is an important part of keeping up with the Industry.

Now, each of these goals is pretty large, so I'm going to stop at 3.

Anyone out there have a list of goals they need to make? Lets make a list and see if we can keep each other on them.

Halfway Mark!

2006-02-16T12:40:00.000-08:00

Phew! I broke 30k! I love half way, somehow it all seems downhill speed from there! Sky is rambling along and it's really becoming one of those stories that you had to get to a certain maturity to understand what you were trying to say. A long time ago I came up with this man with all these hidden depths and colors to him. But 8 years ago, I didn't know how to convey those depths or colors. I just said he had them.

Have any of you come across a character YOU had to grow up to understand? Is that what makes us writers look back on old works and revamp them? What do you think?

Dee

Anyone Got A Map?

2006-02-15T10:07:00.000-08:00

Okay, so, I'm starting to realize there's quite a bit to promoting your book than I anticipated. Or rather, I knew there was, I just wasn't sure how to begin. I mean, it's not like I can go on eHQ and blather on about my upcoming release. So, where does an e-girl go for other reader communities?

I tried to check out All About Romance...I'm sure it's great but I can't seem to navigate it properly. I just can't seem to tell what goes to where or why.

Romance Junkies--am I wrong, is that only a chat and contest site? Not that I'm adverse to either, but I'm not quite ready for them since the book doesn't hit until Summer.

Romance Divas I've been to once before and I'm pretty sure I can get the hang of it when I have some more free time.

Are there more?

I know the point is not to go scream "Buy my book!" even though, hey, I'm not too proud to admit I'd like to do that. But I'm utterly unaware of other communities on the web and methinks that's not a good trait. Anyone got a clue or a direction to send me to find out more about what's out there? I'm ALLLLLLL eyes. :)

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

2006-02-14T08:26:00.000-08:00

For the first year ever, I've sent Gio off to school with his Valentine's and treats ON TIME!! YAY!

Usually, something goes horribly wrong and I forget to get him something to take to his friends. This time, I had cards from last year (his class only had 6 kids last year!) and I remembered to make fudge cupcakes. Mind you, couldn't finish them. My pill was making me sleepy (second? Maybe the third one I'd had that day) and I wanted to stay awake and do it right. So, I stood up (that usually helps) and got started. I made the first batch and sister Pet had to take care of making sure they baked as well as the second batch. Sadly, I crashed. BUT I did get the decorated this morning and packed off to Moo's school!

So, here's to starting Valentine's Day on the right foot and wishing you all a great, romantic day!

Smooches!
Dee

Vicodin and Progress!

2006-02-13T13:14:00.000-08:00

Well, ladies, after much scientific experimenting, it appears that drugs DO help you to think!

LOL, mine did anyway. After three days of steady vicodin use, the cramps are now at a tolerable enough state that I can stand upright and remain that way. There's some complaint in there, but nothing that requires the power of that kind of pain killer, I don't think. I guess the area just needed some rest instead of new pain compounding old pain.

That said, I got quite a bit done. Organized and sorted my books and the shelf they go into. I've probably got it down to about two or three hundred books now and I've packed up the other 2-300 books into a box for a friend of my mothers who has a father who is bedridden and loves to read. Hope he likes the frisky stuff!

And, along with about 8 small loads of laundry, I've gotten back to Sky. We had quite a dark breakthrough and though the couple has yet to even kiss, they've managed to have a great big passionate explosion! I also had the realization that this series has become something of a collection of my favorite classic tales. Sky is really a version of Hades and Persephone, Raven is Cinderella and Tara is really something of a Sleeping Beauty. Once I had that breakthrough, so much more that I was trying to relay came into stunning focus!

And that's how I ended up with 3441 words from this morning's session!

Even better, it brings my new total to 27,000 words out of 60k. That's a whopping 45% folks!
Talk about channeling Jimmie Hendrix!

Dee

Good News, Bad News...

2006-02-10T12:25:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I'm back from the doctor, who was wonderful.

Good news--I've been referred to a surgeon. The doctor says there's no reason I should be in this kind of pain and that as it's so debilitating, odds are surgery (even just exploratory) is obviously needed. She agrees, I've pretty much been in labor for a year. Still, the surgeon will be the guy to decide for sure.

Bad news--I've not had an actual menses since roughly September. Dr was a titch horrified by this as my going this long leaves me open for infection and possibly even endometrial cancer, so I'm going to have to take some meds to bring it on. Unfortunately, this usually feels like I'm giving birth to a ball of razor blades. However, I'll tell you the reason I love my new doctor. She prescribed me pain killers, unlike my last doctor who believed advil was all I should ask for. So, I can't promise I'll be blogging all that well the next couple of weeks. But I'll do me best. :)

On the whole, I'm happy. SOMEthing is getting done instead of my being told to just live with it. There's finally some hope again that it doesn't have to stay like this. Even if I don't get pregnant again, I stand a good chance at walking without pain. :)

Big smooches to everyone!
Dee

PS: Got this on Tanya's site!

I am 58% Evil Genius.

Evil courses through my blood. Lies and deceit motivate my evil deeds. Crushing the weaklings and idiots that do nothing but interfere in my doings.

Take the
Evil Genius Test
@ FualiDotCom

See, this is how I get in trouble...

2006-02-09T11:55:00.000-08:00

I played with my blog. Discovered some new things and liked the look better. I was content. (Well, as content as I get.)

Then hubby had to work REALLY late last night. He came home for dinner, then headed back in. I promised to stay up. I don't trust myself to write when I'm tired, so I thought, well, I'll just work on that annoying header resizing problem on my webpage.

You'd think I'd realize by now that I don't just work on one thing when I hit the HTML. There's about a thousand "While I'm here...."s and before you know it, you're neck deep in some serious updating. Thankfully, hubby didn't get home until nearly 2 am, so I had plenty of time to dig myself out of my hole (take that however you please).

Unfortunately, it was a really big hole.

But a worthwhile one!

So, this morning, up at 7. Remember that "morning person" post? Yeah, once I'm up...I'm up. I'll pass out sometime tonight, I'm sure, but since I was foggy, I hit the HTML again and got most of the pages back in order. There's a lot that needs fixing (I'm making use of subdirectories to make all the sections have their own page IDs. :) ), but it's moderately operable for now. :)

So, if you're inclined to look, the site has been revamped yet again. Not so drastically, though I did off the Black background y'all hated so much, lol. Now it matches this one. :) I solved the resize problem (and feel moderately dumb, but it was tricky, I'll save the REALLY dumb feeling for something else.) and I think it came out pretty cool. :)

Much love to everyone!
Dee

PMS Rage...over?

2006-02-08T09:10:00.000-08:00

I know, shocking! I've redefined the word bitch for more than a week, but I think--like a fever--it's finally broken. Yesterday hurt, I'm not going to lie. But I could think clearly. I laughed with my son, even when he interrupted me. It's like my brain cleared, though I'm not sure when it happened. Today, I actually hopped up and walked around and made tea and felt like a reasonable woman. Not sure how long it'll last, but the heebie jeebies about writing have faded along with the pleas for death and the 8 month waddle!

I'm probably going to have to take it easy for a bit longer, but at least this bout is on it's way out!

That said, I went trolling the blogs I know--and a few I didn't--and discovered much of the world is at peace today. WOW! To that end, I have only a fun quiz I picked up at Julie Cohen's blog. I'm SCOOTER!!

You Are Scooter

Brainy and knowledgable, you are the perfect sidekick.
You're always willing to lend a helping hand.
In any big event or party, you're the one who keeps things going.
"15 seconds to showtime!"

The Muppet Personality Test

And if that wasn't enough to thrill you, lol, here's the Online Fortune Cookie of the day:

Good advice will be given to you; do not ignore it!

Hmmm, wonder what THAT will mean!
Smooches,
Dee

Anniversary?

2006-02-07T08:06:00.000-08:00

It occurs to me that this blog is now, technically...a year old! How's that for a shock? I'm not sure if it really counts, I was TOTALLY spotty for the first four or five months (which I feel really bad about). But this blog has been good to me. I've met a lot of great people and found out I'm only half as boring as I thought. Plus, if it weren't for this blog--or the act of blogging and the great advice of my CP, X--I wouldn't have sold. How do you not love a blog that works so hard for you?

So, here's to a great blogsite that is every day somewhere to unload my itty, bitty brain. :)

But, I'm officially out of Tuesday Teach Day topics. Anyone have some ideas for good conversation? Y'all are more than welcome to teach me. :)

Smooches,
Dee

Grumble...

2006-02-03T18:02:00.000-08:00

I'm not used to fighting with my writing too much. Not that I haven't had rough spots. Or that I haven't pushed the damn book away and done something else. Often times, writing can be a battle and I admit, it's hard to get back in after such a long bloody time off. But I spent hours trying to get back into my groove...and ended up writing a comedy scene for a serious book. Worse, it was slapstick. I HATE slapstick, and yet, I had my resolute and reluctant hero accidentally tear off the bottom of my heroine's dress with his truck door and throw water on her silk dress when she accidentally lit her sleeve on fire.

Have I lost my mind?

Apparently.

Thankfully, I've been blessed with a delete button.

Oy ve....

Friday, God Bless You!

2006-02-03T09:31:00.000-08:00

Ah, up from the penniless scraping! Today's payday--for hubby!

Also, the new fridge arrived and it's virtually silent, particularly compared to the nearly violent rambling groans of the last one. It ain't fancy, of course, but it works and that's all I can really ask. I'm pondering how much it might cost to have an external small freezer, just to keep meats and such in because this puppy has a much smaller freezer than my old side-by-side. Someday, I plan to have a really dream fridgy. Not with a computer in it or anything, lol, but something silent and lovely and roomy.

Even better, have redone my lovely computer and the baby runs like a dream now. Much love to the comp's restore disks and the joy of software updates!

Also, much of my home is put away. It's still a disaster--my desk is overrun with so much crap I'm actually afraid to look at it--but most things have a place now.

The only downside is that hubby will be responsible for purging quite a bit more of his stuff. It took me ten years to get him to get rid of what he dumped before the move, so I'm not really thinking I'll get very far...but wish me luck anyway. I'm hoping his attraction to being able to enter a room without falling down will help in this aim.

Also, I'm hoping to have some time to update pages and edit this weekend. Not holding my breath, but at least I've caught up on so much already!

Off to make tea and dig into the rewrites!
Dee

Take THAT, Pop Ups!

2006-02-02T09:46:00.000-08:00

I kept trying to figure out why my blog had all these annoying pop up ad things. It's been bugging me but I couldn't figure it out. Finally, I realized last night in a fit of cleaning that it was my tagboard! After eliminating that, I've now got a clean blog, so many apologies on that if it was bugging you too.

Also, while I was looking around for things to steal...I mean, TRY, I realized that you're able to use regular hexadecimal codes for color instead of the odd three number combinations that are so limited. (I'm new to blog codes), so this page will soon be adjusted more to my liking! :) Sorry it's taken so long to get back up to date.

Alas, prolly not til the weekend. Moo surprised me by projectile vomiting last night. The last time he was like that, he had pneumonia. Have no idea what brought it on, but he's home today. And fine. Seriously, what is it about kids that makes them bounce back in half a night's sleep?

Well, off to more catching up. With any luck, I'll unbury my desk today. :)
Smooches,
Dee

I WROTE!!

2006-02-01T11:30:00.000-08:00

It wasn't murder I wrote, lol, but it was words! And sentences! And hallelujah, PAGES!! For the first time in three weeks, I was able to settle down and write! Bliss! Sweet heaven! Now maybe I'll stop biting people's heads off, lol.

Well, let's not get carried away...

Anyhow, I'm now firmly on my way to Chapter 5 of Sky. Woohoo! I found several things I needed to repace from my partial and it's moving MUCH smoother now. Added one other thing about my heroine's secret past and current present, so I'm thinking it should go pretty good from here. Back to my two hours of writing time or someone dies rule. I'm rebuilding the middle and I've taken SO much out, but I'm really pleased so far.

As for interesting things...well, I am a housewife, I don't expect there will be a ton of that stuff anytime soon. Laundry, kidlet and most likely, the joy of cooking will be my daily schedule now. But at least I'm going again. It's kind of like being told you can eat ice cream again! Oh, the fridge we have here is sorta half dead and needs replacement. It's being delivered Friday and I'll be needing to cough up half the money for it. Assuming I can FIND half the money for it. With any luck though, that will be the last thing to break down for a while. :)

Big smooches all around, I also hope to return to blog rounds this weekend. :)
Dee

Bad Monkey

2006-01-31T08:32:00.000-08:00

Oy VE, has it been a thrilling last couple of days?

Nope, not here, lol!

Apologies for not getting back to my blogging earlier. It's been crazy with last minute move screw ups, one of which was the fact that my computer crashed and I have it up so I can back up all the info I can get. Then, I'll have to restore it. WHINE!

But, after that, I should be right as rain. For the time being, I have to tilt it every now and then so I can keep it running smooth. (NO idea why that is, but it works, who am I to complain?)

Back soon!
Dee

Morning!

2006-01-27T08:55:00.000-08:00

I'm one of those horrific people that drive the rest of the population crazy: I'm a morning person.

I wake up and it's instant. I get going--worse, no coffee, since I'm allergic to caffiene--and do what needs to be done. I wind down somewhere around 1pm, most likely because I forgot to eat, then I'm at it again until 8. I sit down, relax once the kid is in bed and eat with hubby. I occasionally get to read. Or we watch tv or a movie. Or we work. We're up anywhere from 9 to Midnight. Then we're back up at 6:30, 7am.

My sister, Pet, who is visiting because I'm at the point where I can only get up a few times a day without need for some pain killers (which I don't have), however, is a night person. She likes to stay up until 3 or 4 am...and sleep until 12 or 1pm.

So, since I can't move a lot, I do get the utter enjoyment of waking her up with cheerfulness at 7 in the morning. Picture Wednesday at Summer Camp, lol, and you've got Pet at my house.

Ahhhh, bliss!

Second Contract!

2006-01-26T11:24:00.000-08:00

Okay, woohoo! I've mailed out the contract on my second book, Midnight Sonata, to Samhain! That's it, folks, the first of the Remington's is finally going to have his day! I'm so excited about this because this is a real heart story, about redemption and love and family and healing. :) It also involves a hot guy, his shower and a view. :)

Big smooches,
Dee

Overdo? Me?? Nahhhhh....ow

2006-01-25T10:36:00.000-08:00

Okay, I hit the wall. It was bad of me. I can't help it. Some things needed to be done and in order to know they're done right--and in a timely fashion--I did them myself. Assembling our desks, making the beds--though I was good and had sister help me move the mattresses on one. Boxes had to be shifted. And I had to fall into a lump. By 7pm, I could barely move my legs and the cramping was so bad even laying down didn't help. (Sadly, have not unpacked the heating pad yet.)

So, I'm on Hubby's orders to take it easy today. Is he a wonderful man or WHAT? :)

I'm hoping to have some pics of the new apartment soon. Just want to get mildly set up before I do that.

In the meantime, I'm going to work and watch Full Metal Alchemist again. LOVE that series!

Smooches All,
Dee
(the lump)

RTB Day!!

2006-01-24T06:37:00.000-08:00

Howdy everyone!

I'm ALIVE! And moved in! And up to my eyeballs in boxes, but I did manage to get some snaps and use them in my RTB column! Click the box and see what happened to my desk! I should be back to blogging tomorrow!

Smooches!
Dee

Karma's A Bitch, folks...

2006-01-18T11:10:00.000-08:00

Sorry, lol, but it is. I was just discussing with hubby that when we do things wrong, karma is a bit more instantaneous for us. Cut off a car in the parking lot...can't do what you went to the mall for. Or someone ruins your movie. Or you fall down and break something.

So, I got happy and bragged about stealing signal.

And not ten minutes later...my neighbor locked up their signal.

Apparently, life IS fair folks. People just think that being fair is equivalent to getting their way, lol.

So, now I'm at the coffee shop and prolly won't be able to take the time to blog.

Smooches!
Dee

Okay, so I lied...

2006-01-18T08:24:00.000-08:00

I really didn't think I'd be able to post. Turns out, if you can continue to work with the use of theivery, lol, you CAN steal other people's internet signal and not care. :) Okay, it's not totally theivery. One of my neighbors has unprotected signal. It's low, but totally workable. Can't get on MSN, but my Yahoo messenger is working quite well.

So, snags in the move.

1) My prepaid phone won't work and I'm not paying 50 bucks for three days of phone service.

2) As Moos tend to do, my Moo decided to come down with a vomitous flu three days before the move. SO, he's here next to me, giggling at Spongebob Squarepants. Thankfully, the fever seems to have gone away, but the miracle is that he let me medicate him. Correction: he opened his mouth, allowed me to squirt in 2 TBSPs into his mouth a half a tbsp at a time. This is the kid that usually fights, claws and spits drops at a time, even when he had pneumonia. He's also taken to eating hamburgers and hot dogs...with buns. Considering he considered bread sacrilege until two months ago, that's a miracle.

3) I discovered the game Cubis on yahoo. It's evil how fast a clock can move but my OCD is in love. :)

Wish us luck as hubby hopefully gets his annual review from work today. It's rare for his work to last over a year, so he's understandably nervous, but I feel he's going to do well. And we were talking the other night and realized that in the many moves of our life together, this is the first move we're making by choice. The job didn't fall through. The apartment isn't worse. And in my gut, I know this is just the beginning of a great year.

But in more important news, lol, I'm thinking up all kinds of new features for my webpage this year, which includes getting a domain and setting up a links page. Joining a webring. Plot, plot, plot! AND my muse is gnawing on my leg so I know I'll be able to write when we get settled!

Okay, back to work for me!
Dee

Last Day of Posting

2006-01-16T09:32:00.000-08:00

Hi Gang!

Woohoo! Moving week! Sadly, this means my phone service is going out tomorrow. I'll be online for emails and the like, but I'll have to set the blogging aside. I promise to have tons to say next week. Wish me luck with the move--would like to be able to move without agony next Monday, lol.

Also, hey, I'm open to requests for Tuesday Teach Day. If you've got a topic that boggles you, I can see if it's anything I know anything about, lol.

Big smooches!
Dee

Friday Funnies

2006-01-13T08:24:00.000-08:00

First things first, I'm posting notes about some seriously good book prizes in my Special Event's feature, so look to the right for details and a link.

***

Now, as I've bragged continually, I am moving. Thus, I've already packed many of the non-essentials. Moo's stuffed animals, toys, books. Videos, linens and keepsakes. My books....

Now, I didn't think this would be a problem, until yesterday Moo opened my vault/cabinet and gasped, horrified. "Mommy! No Books! Where Books?? Mommy!!!"

I have yet to figure out if this worse for me or for him.

***

So, last night when I was working, it was pointed out on the message boards that I had referred to myself as a cow. As you no doubt know, I do this kind of a lot. I have something of a self-depricating humor. This isn't to say I believe everything I say about myself--though I am rather mooish--just that I'm really, really comfy with myself. Still, I was scolded. Not sure that I feel bad, but I sure don't know what to do with it when people try to shore up my pathetic self-esteem in response. I mean, call me fat or something and I know how to handle it (with my foot up their ass). Call me pretty and I'm pretty sure you're up to something and I grab a knife. Take a nice middle ground and say, "Oh, you look nice" and I'll probably love you forever (Look at hubby, he said something like that once and the man never saw freedom again.).

***

And, last but not least, a joke or two from the former boss. Lubs ya, Richard!

A CLASSIC

Two little boys in second grade were chosen to be the leads in their first school play. It was to be a Shakespearean play.

The first little boy was to say, " My fair maiden.... I have come to snatch a kiss and fill your soul with hope."

The second little boy was to reply by saying,
"Hark!, a pistol shot."

Well, on opening night in the school auditorium, the two little boys were a bit nervous, knowing that all the seats were going to be filled with grown-ups. The teacher told them to take their places on the stage and to remember to speak very loud as soon as the curtain goes up.

The curtain rose and looking out upon the audience the two boys were terrified. They stood there frozen. So the teacher whispered for them to begin.

The first boy yelled out these unforgettable words....."My fair maiden......... I have come to kiss your snatch! And fill your hole with soap."

The second boy screams out..... "Hark! a shistol pot, a postle shiss, a pot of shit, horse shit, this is bull shit........ I never wanted to be in this lousy play anyway!!"

The audience left howling.

***

Interesting facts...and a warning!

Interesting Year 1981
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes tournament.
4. Pope Died

Year 2005
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes tournament
4. Pope Died

Lesson Learned? - the next time Charles gets married, someone warn the Pope.

Anyone Else Have Blog Probs?

2006-01-12T10:16:00.000-08:00

It was a weird day yesterday. The few blogs that loaded for me wouldn't allow me to comment! Me! I mean, my God, what if I'd had a witty moment? You all might have been ROBBED!

Aside from that, the only thing coming to mind this morning is how freakin' bad I need a bag of chips. Cheetos. Cheese Nips. SOMEthing. I'm almost tempted to drag my fat ass out to the store, but thankfully I'm broke so the ass has the tiniest opportunity to shrink.

I'm thinking writing is possibly the most interesting thing there is about me. My only other major accomplishment is that I can crack a joke in .2 seconds and I can wash (but not fold) laundry.

Update: I have decided to save the boy from death by gnawing and raided the kitchen for something salty. Bacon! In a fit of guilt I stripped the meat from the fat...and came up with a lot less bacon. But, I'm satisfied and the child will be thankful.

So, in an effort to stand myself, I'm probably going to break my writing moratorium and screw the packing. :)

Back later!
Dee

Wednesday Wonderings

2006-01-11T09:39:00.000-08:00

For the first time in months, I'm purposely not writing. This isn't to say that I haven't skipped days. (snort) Just that I intended not to write. I've got my subs off and I've got a week and a half to pack up my apartment. It seems oddly silent and I'm allotting myself today's writing hours to be blogging, hopping, reading and webpage trolling for errors. There's always plenty to do, but not always plenty to talk about.

Kid is off to school. Yesterday I realized that this motherhood thing is kind of nerve-wracking. I mean, I KNEW it was, but you don't get much opportunity to sit down and ask yourself why you go through this. Or, in my case, why I want to get started all over again. It's insane. I know instincts are hard to overcome, but really, why do I WANT this? I mean, my instincts claim that cream puffs are good for me, expound constantly that sex is more important than work or food and that I can too live on donuts alone. Instincts are not to be trusted.

Still, I miss those little eyes and those quiet moments when it's just you and the baby. There will probably be less of that since Moo is allergic to silence. I mean, I don't think I ask a whole lot of life. I've learned to just get used to physical pain. I'll be in it for the rest of my life, I'm resigned to twinges and tweaks. I can be made happy with the right look, truth be told, from either hubby or son. My ambitions are being met, step by step and there's a huge chunk of satisfaction in knowing that I'm doing it on my own. But I still long for one more little face to look at. And worry over. Two more little hands pulling and pointing and waving. And two more little eyes to stare up at me while she nurses, a world of questions there to discover.

Moo blew me a kiss from the bus window. He waved with both hands and a goofy smile. When he woke up this morning, he ran to my bed and cuddled into the blankets so he could close his eyes again, his skinny arms around my neck and squeezing tight until he could sigh with peace.

And I wonder how can I NOT want to start this all over again?

Here's wishing luck and patience to all the lucky moms out there.
Smooches,
Dee

Le Apartment!

2006-01-10T09:19:00.000-08:00

Okay, I admit, I'm WAY too excited about this. But...it's lovely. This isn't the unit, but it's in the same community:

Here are a few pics of the inside, to give you an idea of what it looks like:

The Kitchen:

You may or may not see what I mean about "ickle". But usually, I'm not the same height or taller than my fridge. I think my hips are wider than the dishwasher. Don't worry though, the oven can still fit a full size turkey (that would have been a deal breaker, believe it or not)!

View from the Living Room

Can you say BOOK SPACE??? Ok, prolly some sheets and blankets too, but...nahhhhhh, BOOK SPACE!!!

And I can say that because THIS is the closet! One in each room! Plus, that's only HALF the closet. I could prolly live in just the closet alone...but I'm not gonna! :)

Okay, now that that bit of bragging is completed, I am going to say I've now gotten out my last proposal of January. Woohoo! That one is headed to SamHain. :) In other writing news, I must admit to having removed Raven from consideration to Cerridwen. I believe it might find a home elsewhere, which is what I'm looking for, but the response from the very kind editor there also informed me that the current wait for Cerridwen "is now two to twelve months before response". I was hitting 8. Just thought I'd lay that biscuit out for anyone still waiting. I'm not sure if that amount of time applies to EC, but as they are linked, I'm thinking that one should consider it when waiting for a response from them as well. (Which works out for me as I totally don't have time right now to work on my EC submission. Maybe in March or April. We'll see. :))

Big smooches all around!
Dee

Belfry Day!!

2006-01-10T07:57:00.000-08:00

Believe it or not, I did some meaningful blogging over there today. Definitely worth a looksy!

I should be back this afternoon with another post. Lots to catch up on!
Smooches,
Dee

I got the apartment!

2006-01-05T07:33:00.000-08:00

I'm so excited! I sign the papers today and by the beginning of next month, I'll be in a townhouse! And it's such a CUTE one! I think the word Julie Cohen uses is "ickle", because everything is ever so slightly smaller in some places. The appliances, mostly, but that's okay. There's just three of us. :) The closets are huge, though, and both rooms have their own bathrooms! PLUS the half-bath downstairs! I just can't wait! Promise, when I have time, I'll post some pics.

Also, have my subs and the overview ready for submission. Just have the 1pg synops to do. Should be able to ship out to Blaze tomorrow. :) That'll free me up to pack!

Oh, and in case somewhere you missed it, I'm insane. I enjoy packing. Placing everything just so, labeling til my heart is singing, listing, organizing...it's an OCD paradise! Finally, the house will be utterly, completely SPOTLESS!

Yes, I'm sick, lol.

But I'm taking my sickness to a new place! haha! No more middle of the night car alarms! No screaming people at all hours. No one throwing up outside my window or having lovers spats at 3am! No more kids putting three inch nails behind my car wheels or Doorbell ditching! I'm freeeeeeee!

Well, at least I will be when I'm done packing, lol!
Smooches,
Dee

Bleck!

2006-01-04T10:19:00.000-08:00

So, here I am, laying in bed, trying not to throw up.

I'm not going to claim anything significant here. Just that I can't seem to stand up without attempting to pitch my insides into the nearest recepticle. It's abating somewhat, as I eat some tea crackers because the kid ate the regular ones, but suffice it to say, I'm not sure how much is going to be achieved today.

I DID manage to prep my partials for Blaze. Now to write the synops and project overview. Maybe I can get it mailed out by Friday.

Also, MSN has made a habit of kicking me off. I'm now tired of it and won't be signing back in. At least, not today. Today I'm a Yahooer.

Also, just wanted to send anyone interested over to SAMHAIN so they can take a look at the launch books for this new and exciting publisher! Big congrats to everyone involved and all the launch authors!

Big smooches!
Dee

Discipline? We no need no stinkin' Discipline!

2006-01-03T08:29:00.000-08:00

It's generally the first thing anyone says after the first of the year: "I need more discipline!" And you see it a lot in writer's circles. Almost as much as in dieter's circles. Discipline for writing time, for blogging, for social functions, for housekeeping. And I have to be honest, I've made mention of it more times than I'd like to count.

But if we really need discipline, it's most likely in our ability to say no.

Me, I'm a big one for over-committing. Speaking in minimums, I'm committed to five hours of work, six days a week (30 hrs/wk). Three hours of writing, five days a week (15 hrs/wk). 2 hours of cooking, every day (14 hrs/wk). 1 hour minimum of cleaning house each day (7 hrs/wk). 1 hour for grooming each day (7 hrs/wk). If I'm feeling okay, I have to have at least 6 hours of sleep per night, or bad things happen (42 hrs/wk). As a mother, I need to dedicate at least 2 hours to the care of my son--bathing, brushing, playing, teaching, watching--per day (14 hrs/wk), leaving me 39 hours to spread in an entire week. That needs to include billpaying, paperwork, household shopping/repair, grocery shopping, research and so on. But if you look at those, individually, I've already got 20 hours of my day booked. If any one of those things shifts...I'm out of time in a heartbeat.

And yet, I commit myself to more things. Sure I can do this. Sure, I can do that.

What I really need to decide is...what I can't do.

I can't quit my career--though it may well change directions in the coming years. I can't quit my son or my husband. Sadly, I cannot stop paying bills. (Though not from lack of effort.) Should I streamline? Yes. Can I? Not really. So what does that mean?

It means, dear reader, that I'm going to train myself to say no a little more often. I'm going to really work on not feeling guilty if someone else doesn't do their job. My resolution this year is not to have more discipline. It's to have more respect for the value of my time. And, particularly, for the value of other's time as well.

What are your goals for the new year? Can you fit them in?

Mystical Monday

2006-01-02T10:08:00.000-08:00

Every now and then, I like to take a look at my horoscopes and see if any of them make any sense. Particularly...when shown together. There's no better time than at the start of the year. :)

I start at Susan Miller's site, AstrologyZone:

Now that the holidays are behind you, it appears that you'll soon be hitting the road, either for work or a vacation, and the distance appears to be quite far.

This could be taken two ways, since I never get to take a vacation. One--I'm hoping to move. My apartment is taking a moderate dive toward the Projects and I'd rather not be here when it completely makes the splash. Or Two, my career, as I'm just starting it and there's a hell of a lot to do.

Mars has been zooming through Taurus since last July, so it's apparent that you've been moving at the speed of light.

That would explain the exhaustion.

I am particularly enthusiastic this month to see that the Sun and Saturn will work together in what is called in astrology a mutual reception. That happens when two bodies work in a particularly close, buddy-buddy way. This month the Sun will be in the sign that Saturn rules (Capricorn) and Saturn will be in the sign that the Sun naturally rules (Leo). That will make Saturn act just like the Sun and the Sun act like Saturn. That kind of blending and reciprocal help between the two is called a mutual reception, considered a rare and special help.

Not to be cheeky, but...if the Sun acts just like Saturn and Saturn acts just like the Sun...doesn't that mean nothing changes?

These two heavenly bodies - the Sun and Saturn - will create a link between your ninth house of travel, legal matters, publishing, and higher education, and your fourth house of home, family, and general real estate.

But not my fifth house of cooking? Damn...

Looking closer at your chart, it seems that something you put on a back burner during the last quarter of 2005 will heat up again. With Venus out of phase, you will be encouraged to rethink, redesign, and readdress an endeavor or relationship that seems to have come off track or that is being investigated.

That's probably the two books I was editing, Vetta and Sky. I have to go over them again to make sure I'm headed in the right direction. Plus, I'm deeply considering yanking Raven from Cerridwen, as they've now taken more than a month to get back to my question of whether or not they have a clue what's going on with it. And, of course, I'm prepping the Lonnigans to take a stab at Blaze before this month ends.

Publishing projects are covered by your ninth house too, because this ninth house deals with the gathering and disbursement of information. So, with Venus retrograde, you may go back to finish an old writing project that was sidelined, or if it is done, you'll now work through the editing process.

Yup. See?

As you get closer to month's end, you will begin to see that your career brings enormously good news, thanks to the new moon that will occur at month's end, January 29. This is a trend that will be more about February than January, for a new moon sets up two weeks of opportunity. If you plant seeds either in the last two days of January or in early February, you will have the ability to change the course of your career for the better, and for an entire year moving forward.

Well, I could live with that, lol.

Alternatively, Saturn's presence in the chart may indicate a very responsible position that will mean long and possibly arduous hours on the job. You've never been one to be afraid of hard work, so you seem ready to say, "Bring it on!"

Why is it that every month I visit this woman, she's telling me more work is headed my way? And that I'll like it?

You'll have to see what comes up and decide when you know all the facts.

Oooh, look! Permission to think for myself! WOW!

One thing seems certain - the job would be prestigious and come with true responsibility, but you will feel some measure of push-pull between home and work. I still feel it's worth considering seriously, no matter what the obstacles. No other point in the year will bring anything this special.

And she gives good news....and takes it away. So, the best point of my year ends this month? That's nice. 11 months of misery here we come?

Astrology.com is a bit more succinct, though I love Susan's detail. They also don't seem to agree with her too much.

The 1st-3rd will reportedly have me tired. Check.

7th-9th will make me out of sorts with the infallible tip, "Figure it out, you old bullfighter, and you'll feel better. "--I'm sure I wouldn't have figured it out without them.

"Look out on the 26th, when you have an insight that could shape your whole year."--Could it be to stop reading horoscopes?

Myhoroscope.com:

The people you deal with will detect your anxiousness. If things get to be too much for you, back away and do things by yourself. A partnership may take a turn. Don't make a promise, commitment or comment that could cause you grief.

So...in other words...you're cranky, take a pill and isolate yourself so you don't ruin anyone's buzz. Oh, and whatever you do, don't talk to people. Only God knows what you might say!

Astrology-online.com:

Take care of any pressing medical problems that you or one of your parents may be suffering from. You may be experiencing emotional turmoil in regard to your mate. This is a great day to spend with family. Do not be surprised if your partner doesn't understand your needs.

Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Tuesday.

So, I'm supposed to handle my medical stuff, but spend time with my family. Hmm, oh, and while I'm spending time with my family, my husband won't understand what I want....which begs the question, WHY would I want to spend time with him? Lucky events are all happening on a Tuesday? Well, there goes today....

And finally, a new site for me, Joylight.com:

You will be dealing with issues on a few fronts and how you use them will be different for each case. This will insure that you are, not only learning patience and right use of resources, but, being flexible and seeing all the options.

So everyone agrees...I'm gonna be busy.

Right now you are feeling like you're caught between a rock and a hard place. Digging in and weathering the storm, like you always do, is not going to get it this time. It will be too physically trying on you. You must be out on the firing line to make sure others' choices don't box you in.

But I have my hole all dug!

And don't get paranoid about how you appear. All things are not what they seem.

You mean I'm going to wake up and realize my ass was all a dream??

The instinct is to overdo all creative action almost to the point of hurting yourself. We know that you're an all or nothing person. Don't go overboard. Career issues finally seem to be leveling off. Where you are is where you are...no deceptions.

Funny, Susan seemed to think Career was about to take off. Who to trust? I'm so confused!!! Oh no! Mr. Bill!!!!

Actually, lol, I plan to just listen to my editor, who mentioned I wouldn't get edits until February, good and wonderful woman that she is. Still, here's crossing my fingers some of this stuff happens.

Here's wishing you all a great new year!
Smooches!
Dee

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

2005-12-30T21:21:00.000-08:00

As I sit here on my couch, having a rare sit down with hubby while we watch G4, the anime channel, I'm reflecting on how our year has gone. So much good, so much bad, so much just changing. But I'm grateful for all of it.

I'm also so excited for next year. There's so many possibilities ahead of us and good times ahead.

Here's wishing you and yours a great holiday and wonderful new year!
Dee

Wookin' Pa' Twubul...

2005-12-29T11:35:00.000-08:00

In my quest to return to daily blogging--and God help me, back to blog READING--I allowed myself a bit of time to go looking around the blogsphere. Usually, there's a ton of things to get riled about, but believe it or not, even the Blogsphere grows quiet for the holidays. Not many ranters out there--though, I have to admit, I may not know quite where to look. Basically, it was a good Christmas and most people are content.

Or too frickin drunk to post.

So, I'm going to leave you with today's Online Fortune Cookie (this thing is really cool, I highly recommend it for procrastinating measures):

Many recieve advice, but only the wise profit from it.

But I didn't feel that one really worked for me, so I tried again:

The time is right to make new friends.

Which I think takes me back to trolling blogs...but just for kicks, one more try:

Many recieve advice, but only the wise profit from it.

I'm not making that up, it actually came back. Hmmm...think the interverse is trying to tell me sumpin?

naaaaaaaaah!

LOL, in more important, breaking news, my Belfry buddy and fellow hosty, Kris Starr just sold to Ellora's Cave!! Woohoo Kris!!! Giant congrats and all my best wishes for the future!!

Happy New Year!!
Dee

Promises, promises...

2005-12-28T13:00:00.000-08:00

I keep making them, to myself and to others, thinking I have the slightest clue what I'm doing. I keep most of them. It's just the little ones that are driving me bonkers. Let's go to bed early...I'll copy that disc and get it right off to you...I just need five more minutes and I'll take care of that thing for you...I'll blog every day...I'm GOING to do my blog rounds today, definitely....

Is it the holidays? Or is it just me? Am I just tired of doing and want to sit for a bit? I often wonder if that's just too much to ask. But I have loads of laundry awaiting me and a full days work and I'm thinking, yeah, it probably is.

Is anyone else having trouble fitting their life into their day, and yet, when people ask what you're up to, do you find yourself saying, "Oh, nothing interesting." Or maybe it's just that I'm spending all my time trying to figure out HOW to do everything instead of just doing it.

And is anyone writing?

TTT: The Four Horsemen Pt 3--The Long Synopsis

2005-12-27T10:45:00.000-08:00

This is perhaps the fuzziest of all the synopses, because while it's the most specific, it's also the least trained. Generally, the long synopsis is the tool of the published author and thus not deeply needed for the submitting writer. So no one really gets into it the way they should. I'm not sure I'm about to get into it the way I should, but I do want to make this point perfectly clear: When you start advancing to revision/rejection and out of form letter status, you should consider learning not only this tool of the trade.

I find that with Long Synops, it's hardly ever what it is...but what it isn't, that sets it apart. Keep these points in mind whenever you get the urge to send one along.

What A Long Synop ISN'T:

• less than five pages
• single spaced
• short on details
• short on characterization, motivation or conclusion

You will be laying out your story, truncated, yes, but with plenty of information and plenty of pages. How many you use is often dictated by category. Because, you see, the Long Synop is your big gun. The ammo is expensive and hard to get, so the key to knowing when to use it...is knowing when not to.

When NOT to use one:

• with your initial query letter
• without a specific request from an editor
• when giving a pitch of any kind

But how the hell do you write it, right?

The average long synop is 5-10 pages. This kind is utilized most often and it's the one I heartily recommend. There are authors who write as much as a 30 page long synop. I would not do this unless you've hashed it out with your editor exactly how much detail she would like. She will not welcome a book on your book without an invitation. Also, always double space your long synopsis. I can't say that loud enough. Unless you're dealing with someone who has given you specific instructions to single space, double should be your default. We whine about reading a lot, but no one reads more than an editor. Don't drive them to blindness.

If you've been following this series, you'll realize that you need the previous step to achieve the best results with your synopses. You've inserted voice and interest into the short synopsis--which should really never be more than two pages. My recommended route is to build from your short synopsis. All of your needed elements are already there, as is your story outline. All that is needed are the words we love to say: details.

This is not "padding". You aren't looking just to inflate your word count. You are "layering"--adding details of emotional response, sexual attraction, plot motivators, etc. Read each line of your current short synop and see where you can fill in more blanks. For example, long synopses are where editors get the skinny on your secondary characters--who are they, what role to they fill in your character's lives?--as well as learning more about any particular villain. This is not to say you should go buck wild and tell us their childhood food aversions, but finally, you are able to explain what their purpose is. (And if you can't find one...you need to go back to that ms.) Keep in mind that you will still need to maintain your tone and much of your concise sentence structure and you should be fine.

Now, some authors actually use quotes from the ms to illustrate points of interest. If used sparingly--pretend it costs you a hundred dollars every time you do it--this is acceptable. However, the caveats are as follows:

• Be sure it's worth quoting--doesn't move the story forward, don't use it.
• If you have less than ten pages in your synop, don't use it. Believe it or not, you just don't have the space.

If you layer your short synopsis correctly, you should have a nice long synopsis that already contains all of your required elements along with the complete ending. Should you have an epilogue you didn't add into the short, this is the time to put it in. Double check for flow, tone and voice and get it out the door. Few things will ruin a synopsis faster than time to obsess. If you have a CP, run it past them. This should not be a 6 pass event. Once, maybe twice if drastic changes are needed (and if you had a complete short synop, they shouldn't be) is all that you need.

The final tip about synops: They are NEVER more important than the book. A selling tool, a skill to be desired, yes. But if you put as much time and energy into the synop as you do the book, you won't have a chance to sell it. Write it good, write it right, write it gone.

Then get onto the next project. :)

Well, Crap...

2005-12-20T21:44:00.000-08:00

Okay, it's not happening today. This close to Christmas, I'm afraid that it's not coming off this week, either. WHINE.

Many apologies, but I owe y'all.

Dee

Delay Post

2005-12-20T09:51:00.000-08:00

Hi Everyone!

First, thanks for helping me hit 5000 page views!! I'm really ridiculously happy about that one, lol!

Second, due to powers beyond my control, I have to be out of my house until tonight. They're doing work on my apartment. BUT, I'll post the final 4 Horsemen post tonight! Promise! To make it up to you, my friend sent me this and it's too damn funny to miss! You need Windows Media Viewer to see it, but trust me, it's TOTALLY worth it! Thanks Marcy!!

Wife Meets Girlfriend

Smooches all!
Dee

Monday Mooing

2005-12-12T08:05:00.000-08:00

My Chargers! WAAAAH! They lose, to the Dolphins of all people. Granted, there's some sort of curse against the D's ever since beating them up in 1982, but come on. I blame one thing: The Offensive line just couldn't hold a drop of water. Not that I don't love them, but perhaps too many injuries and trading off of guys finally caught up. Not sure. I just hope this inspires them to beat Indy. I just don't know if they're still ahead in the wild card placement. I mean, come on, why couldn't Pittsburgh lose? Just for me. Don't they owe me? *nailbiting* (Just caught SportCenter...Pittsburgh just one upped us for the wildcard slot. Sorry Rae, have to hope them a few losses!)

Spent the weekend with some technical work and a surprise visit to my mother's yesterday. Moo got to hang out with his cousin--one of the only three boys in our family--which just made his lifetime. We finally got a few of the small presents wrapped and under the tree. The boy spent a good half hour under the tree trying to hug them all at once.

Big News:

1) My son is a smart ass. He's witty, but there's limitations to that because he doesn't quite have all the nuance that I fear he will in a few years. So, he's just been served a mini-pizza and it's hot like you wouldn't believe. He touches it, desperate to try it, but dropps it because, yes Mom, it really MIGHT still be on fire. I tell him to blow on it first. Puff. Puff. OW!!! So, I say, "Count to ten first." What does the fruit of my loins say? "Ok. One. To. Ten." Fingers were burned but pizza was good.

2) The boy ate a hamburger. A whole one. With a bun! I make a lot of effort not to have a reaction when he eats something he normally wouldn't touch with his life on the line. Plus, he ate apple. APPLE! Fresh one! He even chewed it! I'm in Mommy Heaven!!

Hope you all had as interesting a weekend as me!
Dee

(Sidenote: Coming up on the 5000th click on this blog! How's that for cool??)

Hmmmms from The Old Boss

2005-12-10T09:04:00.000-08:00

Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE

Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

OK.... so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," what does that make the Tennessee Titans?

If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one enjoys it?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?

Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP?

Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me.....they're cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? toothpicks?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?

Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice: When you put the two words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "THEIRS"

Thursday Ramblings

2005-12-08T08:35:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I have emptied out my apartment and I'm casually waiting for the carpet cleaners to arrive and erase more than a years worth of Moostomps and spills. I scrubbed most out, but let's face it, I've been lazy this year. Too much time on my back meant not enough on my knees. (Hmmm, if I had a dirty mind, that might sound bad...for hubby.)

Anyhow, I'm off to spend a few hours at the local coffee shop. I have managed to get my fat butt back on the bike. I'm taking it really easy at a max of 6 miles before I fall off and beg for death. Whatever baby I have someday is not going to want me to be unhealthier than I already am. And who knows, maybe the exercise won't trigger the agony when I'm off the pills. We'll see.

That about covers my whining today. Am hoping to schedule some time to write. The plan is to take the rejected Lonnigans and edit them upward to the 75k size for Blaze. I really think they could do well there--Frisky, unique and emotional. I'm still editing Vetta in EC hopes. And I'm pretty sure that Betting Hearts will need some working over prior to it's release date. I know it needs a bit more fleshing to the tune of 4k (I thought it was 60k, but it turns out it's a bit shy, but that's okay, there's room to polish.) So, my writing future is planned out. :)

Off until tomorrow!
And for those who need some tickled funny bones, here's a lil treat sent from my old boss:

AIRLINE CABIN ANNOUNCEMENTS

Here are some real examples of airline attendants making an effort to make the in flight "safety lecture" and announcements a bit more entertaining.

1. On a Southwest flight (SW has no assigned seating, you just sit where you want) passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, "People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!"

2. On a Continental Flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."

3. On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have.

4. "There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane"

5. "Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."

6. As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Ronald Reagan, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!"

7. After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a Northwest flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted."

8. From a Southwest Airlines employee: "Welcome aboard Southwest Flight 245 to Tampa. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised."

9. "In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite."

10. "Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines."

11. "Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."

12. "As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. But please do not leave children or spouses."

13. And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Delta Airlines is pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!"

14. Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hard landing in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump, and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault, it was the asphalt."

15. Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, TX, on a particularly windy and bumpy day when, during final approach, the Captain was really having to fight it. After an extrememly hard landing, the flight attendant said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate."

16. Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."

17. An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the Passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying our airline." He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?" "Why, no, Ma'am," said the pilot. "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we land, or were we shot down?"

18. After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Capt. Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open ! the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal."

19. Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of US Airways."

20. Heard on a Southwest Airline flight. "Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing and if you can light 'em, you can smoke 'em."

21. A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax... OH, MY GOD!" Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" A passenger in Coach yelled, "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!"

TTT: Four Horsemen Pt 2

2005-12-06T07:44:00.000-08:00

Ahhhh, the Apocalypse continues.

The Third Horseman of our evil writing duties is the Short Synopsis. Now, if you remember our last two examples, you'll see how each grew from the previous by adding a bit more information. Your key ingredients of Hook, Character, Conflict must be present in all, and right from the get-go. But, where the logline is about the mainest character, the blurb should be a paragraph each about both core characters. Heroine is usually first because the editors know that readers need to relate to the heroine. (Courtesy of Brenda Chin: "The reader MUST relate to the heroine and fall in love with the hero." This is a golden rule of romance. Learn it. Live it. Love it. And just to keep this difficult, both of these things need to happen as early as possible. First chapter. No "Eventually we'll get to know her". No "We'll be in love with him at the end". This is part of your unspoken hook. If the reader doesn't connect with your characters immediately, they won't keep reading. Period.)

I'm going to give credit where credit is due and admit that I didn't come up with this next step. Your favorite naughty girl and mine Lyn Cash did it. I am admittedly not smart enough to have figured out how to make the jump from good blurb to good synop. I have sucked--without vacation--for 8 years at writing synops. Just could never get it together. She's the briliant one. I'm just the loud one.

Now, to start your short synop, you can pick up your blurb and call that the first two paragraphs. There are some rules, reportedly, to writing synops. I'm no great purveyor of rules. They blind you to your own instincts in my own opinion, but some of them are there for purely common sense purposes. We're going to include those here:

Things you need to know and put into your synnop:

1) What is the situation?: Let us know who your characters are at the start of the story and what they are into that's going to make their lives difficult and why they are willing to enter this adventure. "Candy store owner Elizabeth Clarke is in trouble, Bickner Chocolates is claiming she stole a formula from them and she can't prove she didn't."

2) Plot points: Create a list of the main plot twists: "Elizabeth goes undercover at Bickner to discover who is stealing her recipes; She's caught by security, who agrees to help her after hearing her plight; Elizabeth discovers the traitor and turns them in." No details. Simply the order in which the most important aspects of the situation happen. Make a separate list for both primary characters.

3) Turning Points: People define these differently. To me, a TP is the point that twists the relationship in a new direction. These are usually separate from the plot points, but can coincide. Make a list of them, you should have a minimum of four in any complete novel:

The Meet: Introducing the characters changes something for both of them--new course.

• 1st Change: When they discover something about one another that changes their original impression--he sees a moment of her humanity instead of her career driven desperation. she sees a kindness in him that is at odds with the hard ass schmuck he's been so far--OR overturning previous positive impression--she discovers he's friends with her enemy, he learns she's a vindictive cow.

• 2nd Change: Accepting that the other is not so bad because they are forced by their situation to deal with one another or simply accepting their sexual attraction and acting on it, despite believing the other person is less than stellar.

• 3rd Change: The Black Moment. The party is over. Faced once again with eachother's shortcomings--or percieved shortcomings--the pair will part and learn what life is like without the other. Mind you, they should definitely NOT enjoy this period. If they do, you're doing something wrong.

• 4th Change: Resolution. Having despised life alone, they come back together with acceptance and change from both parties. This is your happy ending.

There are multiple combinations of this list, The Meet and 1st Change often are combined, or 1st and 2nd Change are combined. Or, you can do all five. It's up to you, but you should have an exact list of what each point is for them as a couple.

Now, your job is to combine all of these events in a fast, subjective and punchy set of paragraphs (alternating who you're discussing by para) to create a page of synopsis.

Things to avoid putting in your short synopsis:

• Secondary and especially Tertiary Characters: Don't need em, don't want em. Leave em out. Trust me.

• Details: We don't even really need to know what city they live in. That includes what color hair, how tall, why they're pysically attracted to each other. Nada.

• Padding words: Though, but, and, actually, Then, So. You're adding word count and really, you don't have the room. One or two isn't a bad thing. But definitely try to keep them out of your sentence structures.

Now, how do we combine all of this crap I've dumped on you? You write sentences that cover a LOT of ground. You're not here to be fancy or flowy. You're here to get the story out concise and with a little bit of your voice. But the key word is PUNCHY. Nothing long, nothing artful. Get to the point and move on. Move from plot point to plot point, intersperse with turning points where they come in the course of the story. Add a little bit of the tone and remember to stay in present tense.

Here's an example:

Candy store owner Elizabeth Clarke is in trouble, Bickner Chocolates claims she stole a formula from them and she can't prove she didn't. Unable to decide which of her dedicated workers has sold her recipe to the chocolate mogul, Elizabeth decides to infiltrate the company herself--until she's caught by a security guard on overnight duty...at least, that's what he looks like.

Undercover agent Russ Stover's luck couldn't be worse. The night he's waited months for is being blown by a loopy candy cook with delusions of theivery. Rather than start all over, he takes her with him to uncover how the choco-magnate is secreting out drugs with their sweet treats. But how is a guy supposed to do his duty when there's a sugar coated redhead next to him, ready to eat?

Elizabeth refuses to be sidetracked by Russ's refusal to explain what he's up to. Getting away from him, she finds the research dept, unknowingly setting off alarms before finding proof that her dearest friend has betrayed her. Russ rescues her from the factory before they can be caught, but at the cost of his own case. Elizabeth's guilt compounds her hurt and she offers to do what she can to make it up to Russ. Whatever she can...

Taking advantage of Elizabeth's guilt isn't really what Russ wants to do, but neither is going to bed alone. Besides, Elizabeth's former employee is just the person he needs to get back into Bickner's illegal activities. What's wrong with mixing some business with sweet pleasure? The only problem is, the more tastes he gets of Elizabeth, the less interested he is in catching the bad guys. Until she finds out that she's little more than a means to an end. Then Russ is on his backside on her curb and sweetness is nothing more than a bitter memory.

Not liking to see how empty his life is without Elizabeth--or admit it was empty before her--Russ throws himself into his work. But Bickners isn't about to leave a loose end like Elizabeth alone and now the only way to protect her is to put them away. Making use of her former employee, Russ invades the factory once more and unearths the drug supply hidden within. The Bickner's venture is over. Elizabeth is safe. So why does he still want to see her?

Elizabeth's life hasn't been going so well. Missing Russ, having trouble trusting her new employee, she's none-too-thrilled when the press hoardes her to ask about the fall of Bickners. Learning the truth of the takedown--and Russ's part in it--Elizabeth rushes to his apartment to find him. He's surprised to see her, but he won't let her apologize. He admits he was wrong to hide his case from her and to let her think she meant nothing more to him. Elizabeth offers a second chance, for both of them. He still has his sweet tooth and she's sure she has a lifetime's worth of sugar to keep him satisfied. Russ is too busy sampling the goods to even think about arguing.

Now, I'm not callling it nobel peace prize winning, but it gets the story across in a single page. Sunny's rule of thumb, 1-100k book=1 page short synnop. If you go over that, you're going on too long. Keep it short, keep it sweet. You'll see better results.

Next week: The Long Synopsis

Brag Blog?

2005-12-05T08:35:00.000-08:00

I got to wondering...what are we supposed to put in our blogs? I think we get it in our heads pretty frequently that we have to have to have something important to say before we blog. I know I do.

"I should teach!" or "I should say something really meaningful" or "I should inspire someone" and it really just occurred to me that that is a lot to ask of a body. I mean, hell, I'm barely inspired to get out of bed in the morning. It's too damn early. It's too damn COLD. You know what inspires me--and this is by no means a signal that I don't absolutely love my child--? I think of a whole 5 hours of uninterrupted thinking or doing. I don't have a particular desire to do or think on any one thing. Truthfully, I have to make lists everyday to make sure I think of the right things in the right order. I'm inspired by the lack of "Mommy" every two minutes. My son couldn't talk for the first 4 years of his life--he's catching up with a vengence.

I think about those great blogs where writers sound off about things that just piss them off. Sure, some of them are irrational blatherings of the easily spooked or the desirous of rage types, but to have that much energy to put in a blog? Wow. That's some big competition to deal with. It makes you want to do something with your blog. Something that's going to have everyone talking. Everyone up in arms. Everyone.

Truth is, I don't brush my hair until my hubby comes home at five. I only get dressed because the bus driver gives me weird looks and the homeless people shun me when I take the kid for his morning pick up. I work. Every day. I eke out writing time, not that you'd know it this year. And I raise a kid in my own exhausted fashion. Some days, I'm not too bad a mother. Other days, I'm the shittiest mother alive. I definitely don't have time to get real political. I certainly don't have the energy to be meaningful. So why the hell do I put myself through thinking I should be?

I'm really sure that at some time really soon, I might figure that out. For now, I'm working on being less meaningful and more present. At least, that's the plan. :)

Smooches,
Dee

Time Doesn't Fly....

2005-12-02T07:21:00.000-08:00

It skyrockets like a bat out of hell.

So now it's Friday morning and as usual, I feel like I'm falling behind. Moo pulled up sick, the poor kid. He came home the day before yesterday lay on the floor and didn't get up for six hours. This is the kid I usually beg to sit still long enough to eat his dinner. I feel so bad to see him this way and he's a bear to medicate.

Now, I'm not complaining, but is it me or does the onset of December mean that there's suddenly so much more to do? Less time, less energy, less everything. Last night I had the hugest impulse to write...and by then I was falling asleep on the couch. My first real impulse in months! And all I could do was think about the things I hadn't done yet. HTML that wasn't completed. Links not finished. Items not built. Schedules not finalized. Shoot, I haven't even had tme to fix the broken screws on my bed and that'll take five minutes, tops. And that's not even my writing work.

Now, I know that it's often said I invent work for myself. I make things harder than it has to be. I want my work to look right and more importantly BE right. I don't think I have particularly high standards--if you saw the way I look around noon every day, you'd know...I don't have high standards--but I want to get all my bases covered. I think it's a quality that makes me a good writer, when I can incorporate it into my editing and plotting. But it probably makes me difficult to others. Clean the kitchen, you better wipe the counters. Build a discussion, make it worth the author's time to promote there. Write a story, make it complete.

Eh, I prolly just have the blahs. Hope your December is starting off with a better mood than mine. :)

PS--I toned down the white titles. Less eye-stinging? Or too hard to read?

Smooches,
Dee

Going Through The Change....

2005-11-29T08:55:00.000-08:00

Not quite the usual change, of course, but still a change for me. In honor of the redesigned Website, I've changed the blogface as well. Now, there's not as soft and leafy Dee as there is slightly edgy Dee. Not that I'm super edgy or anything, but I'm definitely not Nature Girl and I was thinking that the green look was misrepresenting that. If you get a chance to pop over there--it's not all complete, but certainly navagatable--you'll see I've got a new tagline and room to show my various writing sides. I'm hoping to have new excerpts and so on, but the writing stuff won't go away, I promise. It's all there. When the book comes out, I'm hoping to have it on my own domain, but better to practice a bit off the beaten path. :)

I wanted to take another minute to thank everyone for all the congratulations. I swear, whenever I feel over my head and totally out of my league, I'll be coming back to all of those posts to get me through. You're all so so good to me.

As for today, I'm off to the dentist. :) Final deep cleaning appt and then I'm back to business. I haven't had blogs over the holidays before, so I'm not sure how much I'm going to get done here through December. Hopefully a lot. I'll keep trying if you keep reading. :)

Happy Holidays to everyone!
Dee

Brand New Week

2005-11-27T22:44:00.000-08:00

I had a lovely Thanksgiving. Various family, various dishes...WAAAAAAY too much food. Particularly going down my throat. Oh GOD I ate sooooo much. But, I reasoned, this is the first year when I sold a book. I deserve the fruit salad. And the pumpkin pie. And the whipped cream. And...well, I won't even go into the other rewards (but the did do quite a bit to off set all the food!)

So, as I prepare to go to bed so I can wake up early and throw the kid on his bus--please,God, I miss school--I try to think of things I need to do tomorrow. Work, of course. I did a lot of prep work and tons of that just needs to be posted, but I'm also thinking of the future. I work in PR, so, I know that to make my book a success, I have to sell it. And, I have to look forward and show what I can do. The first step to that is to rework my website. Which, thankfully, I enjoy doing. The trick is to do it secondarily. It means reworking my schedule, as well.

Oy, this is going to take some thinking.

But hey, what a great reason to fire up the braincells!

Happy Monday to all!
Dee

Um...I sold

2005-11-22T07:34:00.000-08:00

I always pictured I'd jump up and down, scream a lot and freak out.

Instead I stared at my computer. And stared. And stared. And stared some more.

Then I ran to my husband and uttered the two words I wondered if I'd ever get to say. "Um...I sold."

Since he was in mid-step out of the bathroom, he turned his head, blinked twice and said..."What?"

ROFL, and thus, I suppose, begins my professional career, lol.

I don't have a lot of details and my hands are shaking, so here's the run-down, folks. :)

The book is "Betting Hearts", a comedy so damn close to the inside of me I couldn't even bear to rework it for Harlequin when they felt the heroine wasn't up to snuff. So I hid it and told myself not to try to work on it again. But I took a chance and sent it to Samhain Publishing and the editor there saw the possibilities, I suppose, because she offered me a contract.

God, 8 years of hoping to sell and I have not a clue where to start my thanking, but I know I must start with these three:

Rae--I know you said I can't make you cry anymore, but just one more time, I promise. I have to thank you first, because you've listened to me whine the longest. Thank you SO much, for being there at every turn, no matter how bad it got or how wrong I could ever be. I would have given up a long time ago without you, on so many different things. You are the truest of friends and I don't get to tell you that enough.

X--You've read nearly every book, every horrible line, every paragraph of every thing I write. And you still like me. LOL! Thank you for not being afraid to punch me in the teeth. For being the best damn CP anyone could ever want. God, you're the other part of my brain most days. You're who I look to when the words won't work and the rejections make me feel petty. I cannot begin to thank you, but please know, I try. :)

Marcy--For being an eternal wellspring of kindness and hope. You are the most caring person on the planet and for some reason I've not yet figured out, you share both of those beautiful attributes with me. :) My heart thanks you, my soul thanks you and everything in me just wants to tell you how I appreciate all that you do, for so many people, every day that you are here. Love you much, doll.

Okay, I know there's so many more, but I'm so stunned I don't want to mess it up. Thank you to EVERYONE who has ever been part of this journey. There's too many people and not enough time. But I truly appreciate the support of everyone who ever said I had a shot and didn't mind me holding a gun. :)

All my love,
Dee

Monday Meanderings

2005-11-21T10:27:00.000-08:00

Well, it's holiday week, gang. I seriously doubt I'll be doing more than a cursory post. Tomorrow is a dental appointment--and I get to take the kid, lol--then it's baking and cooking on Wed for a morning Turkey Day on Thursday. Then it's Family, family, family. But I'll do my best to get you a funny once or twice this week.

Happy Holidays to All!

Smooches,
Dee

European Conquest At An End...

2005-11-20T09:52:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone!

Well, with my 6 month mark on my Modern Extras (new Temptation) submission signals the end of my ms consideration in Richmond. They decided to pass on my two book series. They felt that there were problems with luring the reader to the second book--due to the story and the character who takes lead. On the flip side, they felt I'm a competent writer who's done my research on the genre, but since my humor is much more like early Temptation--a humor that apparently isn't very global and doesn't translate well outside of the US--they don't think revision for resubmission is something they want to see.

Being compared to early Temptation ain't a bad thing. Those are the books I fell in love with. Viva La Vicki! LOL!

As for my humor not doing well overseas, they would certainly know. I'll hold off on arguing it until I have some overseas sales, :)--so it could be a while, lol. But, I've decided that my humor is who I am and while I'm all right with being a titch mercenary in selling my work, I won't be changing my voice to suit a line to that extent. I can go dark, I can go moody. But it's not in me to sacrifice my voice for the sale. I've tried that once, changing it all to suit an editor, and it nearly destroyed my ability to write. It certainly cost me more than a year. So, I think it's safe to say I won't be resubmitting to MX anytime soon. But that's okay. :) There's many places open to me at this time. :)

I've sent in a submission to the new SamHain Publishing (See Shannon! I did it! I get to keep my f'n ass now, yes?) and I'm prepping a second one for December. I've subbed to EC as promised and I'll be checking on my Cerridwen submission Dec. 1st, it's 6-month mark. I think it's a lot easier to handle a rejection when you know there's other places to send it. So far, it's not the worst rejection I've ever had. I'll probably be able to calm my ego with a serving of yogurt and call it a day.

Hope you all are having a great weekend and that your upcoming holiday isn't stressing anyone out. :)
Smooches,
Dee

Thank You Smart Bitches!

2005-11-18T09:44:00.000-08:00

Boy, you don't get to say THAT everyday!

So, I was treating myself to some fun blog hopping. It's been a while since I've been so overwhelmed, and as I lay here trying to ignore slight cramping, I thought...what the hell. Read some blogs! You've worked hard all week. You deserve it!

And when I landed on The Smart Bitches page, lol, they had the best picker-upper of the day. I give you...my name, lol!

LOL, that's weekend making, right there!

SHE DID IT!!

2005-11-16T09:11:00.000-08:00

It's the kind of announcement that requires capital letters.

HEATHER RAE SOLD!!!

I've been waiting five years to get to scream that into the phone and wow, was it sweet. It's even better in print. Lemme do it again.

HEATHER RAE SOLD!!!

I got to be lucky enough to be a CP for her over the years. I got to be even luckier to be there when she came up with the idea in New York while we walked around avoiding Meg Ryan stalkers. But the best part is that I got to be lucky enough to be her friend for every up and down on this crazy journey.

Congratulations Rae, no one deserves it more.

So, if y'all would please, head on over to Raecy's Place and congratulate her.

Smooches,
Dee

Lil Black Rain Cloud

2005-11-14T08:39:00.000-08:00

My CP likes to call me this. Mainly because when it rains, it pours. And I pour regularly. I don't mean to, honest. I guess I like to do everything at once, good stuff and bad. Writing news comes in multiples and so do health things.

Apparently, I have a tooth problem now. Honestly, I've probably had it for awhile but it most likely got masked by the pain killers I've been taking for months. So, since I stopped taking them, I've discovered that a toothache can really knock the snot out of you. So, I've not got a somewhat-emergency dental appointment. They may or may not need to rip out the tooth. Wish me luck, folks.

In other news, I've fixed the focal point of my book. It turns out...it didn't have one before. In all this editing I have discovered that my characters had no conflict BETWEEN them. So, you've got two people who's biggest problem is whether or not he loves her. Uh...no. That needs fixing. My heroine is too perfect, too flawless, the cow. So, along with creating her something of a lie and a dilemma...I'm also adding saddlebags and a very saggy ass. Take that, flawless cow!

So, while I have been doing tons of work on it...we're at about 80 pages still. BUT, it's 80 pages with a point! WOOHOO!

PS--Depending on tooth-pullage, there may or may not be a TTT day tomorrow. Just a heads up!
Dee

Recovery

2005-11-11T08:07:00.000-08:00

It's a nice enough sounding word. I like it. But way easier to say than do.

On your computer, recovery is finding something you accidentally deleted or lost.

In your manuscript, it's deep diving to find some aspect of your work that's useable.

In your body it's letting yourself rest to restore it's health.

And every now and then, you have to do all three.

Let me tell ya, folks, it's not easy.

I thought I was innocently killing a gnat. I took a tumble and landed flat on my back. I will never again laugh at the old woman saying, "I've fallen and I can't get up." At the time, it was funny. Stupid even. Now, with my whole body sore, I'm feeling a little more empathetic to old people with low muscle tone and brittle bones.

I've been revising a book--when time and my non-supportive body allows me--that I thought would be fairly easy to put together...recovery in that case is rediscovery of my brain. I love this story, but it needed help. So far, I've removed almost as much as I've kept. So, while I'm on page 80, I've actually sorted through 150 pages. Hoping to achieve a lot more this weekend.

On my computer...I haven't lost or deleted anything. But oddly enough, I can never find what I'm looking for. At least, not until I don't need it anymore.

So, am I losing my mind or is this what happens when you get close to 30?

Smooches,
Dee

TTT: The Four Horsemen part 1

2005-11-08T09:25:00.000-08:00

You'd think it'd be easy to write explanations of your own book. But it's not. It's a pain. You have to fit an entire story into a few lines or pages. But what do you put in? How do you know if you've done it right? What belongs in the little things and what do you have to take out of the big things. First off, you need to know what each one is. I like to think of them as The Four Horsemen...because submitting often feels like trying to survive the Apocalypse

Now, commonly, people think a blurb is what goes on the back of a book. It sort of is. It's both more and less. There are four things a writer must master to have a successful career: The LogLine, The Blurb, The Short Synopsis & The Long Synopsis. Each one is a nightmare unto itself, but thankfully, if done in the right order, you can do one and expand it into the next. The key three things to include in ALL of them is this: Hooks, Characters, Conflict. The more room you have, the more you can expand into motivation, plan to solve problem, etc. But if you don't have those three things at even the shortest level, your logline, blurb, SS or LS is incomplete and will likely fail. Today we will cover the first two.

The Logline is a one or two line sentence that conveys the hooks of your story, the characters and the conflict, usually into a compelling statement or question that draws the editor (readers don't see these too often) into wanting more. Loglines are used at the top of a query letter and most effectively in an editor pitch, where you have to describe your book in 25 words or less. They maximize your time and the editors interest.

ex) "Girl next door Jenna McCain's lifelong plan to marry rancher Cord Erikson would have gone off without a hitch, but how was she to expect his ex-wife to interfere...and bring a baby along?"

Hooks: Girl Next Door, Rancher, Secret Baby
Characters, Jenna and Cord (includes villain, ex-wife)
Conflict: she's loved him forever, he has a past, can she get in the way of that and live with herself?

Now that you have those elements in a sentence, you can use them to stay concise while you enlarge The Logline into The Blurb.

The Blurb causes trouble because it's much larger, roughly 30-200 words. It is the length of the back of the book and it, too, must contain the three elements listed above. If you do a one paragraph blurb--my personal favorite--you discuss both main characters in the same paragraph. You START with your hook and your character. Move next to your alternate character's problem (conflict). Then wrap it up with what needs to be done to solve the problem. If you choose the two paragraph type (the 200 word version), then you will need a paragraph for each character that states their individual hooks, character, conflict and plan to solve their issues.

To help you do this, I've created a way to build a paragraph blurb using three simple questions:

1) HOOK: Why do people want to read this book? Because "Girl Next Door Jenny McCain is finally marrying the man of her dreams."

2) CHARACTER & CONFLICT: Why is this important? She's spent her life in love with Cord Erikson, despite heartbreak and loss, and now their day is finally here. Or, it would be, if Cord's ex-wife hadn't materialized on his doorstep, holding a baby she claims is his.

3) PLAN TO SOLVE PROBLEM: What do they need to do to solve their problem?With the wedding just around the corner, Jenny knows that Cord has an impossible decision to make. Can she finally stand up for their love, even if it means raising another woman's child?

Then, when you have those sentences, combine them in a para:

"Girl Next Door Jenny McCain is finally marrying the man of her dreams.She's spent her life in love with Cord Erikson, despite heartbreak and loss, and now their day is finally here. Or, it would be, if Cord's ex-wife hadn't materialized on his doorstep, holding a baby she claims is his. With the wedding just around the corner, Jenny knows that Cord has an impossible decision to make. Can she finally stand up for their love, even if it means raising another woman's child?"

Since this is a completely made up story so far, an exercise for you might be to try to write a paragraph for Cord using this process.

Remember, editing is always a writer's best friend. Things to look for when going over your finished blurb, is where you can remove to make it more stream-lined. Connective words can be a real word-cutter: but, that, and, and whatever possessive pronouns you don't strictly need. Particularly with blurbs, you want to avoid buts, ands and especially thats. They can drag a sentence into the ground. Keep the pace quick and direct. That'll grab people every time.

What Makes For Good Pacing?

2005-11-07T08:29:00.000-08:00

I've been laying here wondering as I edit my submission, is this book slow? Is the infomation pertinent? Does it really have to be here?

When I'm editing, I usually look for flow, characterization, placement, dialogue and of course, is this scene necessary? It certainly feels necessary. It's transitionary, but there's no action. It's emotional...but doesn't move the story very far forward. There are few things I hate more than cutting a good scene because it doesn't move the story. On the one hand, I'm kicking myself for wasting the good writing on something so ineffective. On the other, I hate throwing it away. But writing requires ruthlessness. Sometimes the scenes just have to go.

Which brings me to my current dilemma. I'm editing for an ePub, which I'm told requires a bit faster of a pace. The chapters are shorter and the story needs to be more concise. All right, this isn't a bad idea. I just hadn't realized how long I've meandered on. I'm in chp six and so far the only ones without a well-developed relationship are the hero and the heroine. He gets along with her kid. She's friends with her mother in law. He's got a friendship with his doctor. She's playing mediator with MIL's boyfriend.... I just need to cut this crap out.

Have any of you found something in your writing that is driving you bonkers? Can you fix it?

Editing update: Edited through page 65.
Pages Left: 170

Meme-me-me-meeeee!

2005-11-05T08:08:00.000-08:00

Ahhh, if she didn't have pain killers, I'd smack ya Rae, lol! I've been tagged.

But first, a little up to dateness:

I went to the doctor to see what he could give me for dealing with the endometriosis pain. His answer...shutting down my ovaries with a temporary chemical menopause. He says narcotics will handle the pain, but they're addictive and do not treat the condition, which will advance and I'll need more and more. Or I could try Motrin instead of Aleve--which is like saying I can rub my belly and see if that fixes it. Or I can try to get pregnant.

Now, before y'all imagine I might have jumped the gun, I did research the drug he prescribed. That is some scary crap. It's a nasal spray, taken twice a day, that turns off your ovaries, meaning no hormonal output. You have to take birth control pills to provide some hormone, but anything in your body that works via hormone is going to quit. You have to take calcium supplements because the stuff causes bone loss--which you're supposed to probablyget back within a year. Or so. That says nothing about the side effect of Auto-Immune Difficiency.

It probably goes without saying that I've wanted another child for years. Many years. And though hubby and I agreed that having one would be great, the desire couldn't be justified against our financial situation. If I got preggers on accident, great. If not, that's how it had to be. But the truth is, this may well be my last chance to try to have a child as the dr assured me that even pregnancy can only push back the endometriosis. Nothing will cure it. At least this way, I'll have a chance, so we're taking it. :) The only downside is that without my b/c pills, there's no regulation of the condition at all. That can lead to heavy bleeding and as I'm trying to get pregnant, I can't take anything but Tylenol for pain. So, this path isn't without detriment. But it'll be worth it in so many ways. So...I'll keep you updated on if the quest is successful.

And now...The Meme!

Three screen names that you've had: Tien1050, Deelicious & Deelicious_92123

Three things you like about yourself: I'm a fast reader, I'm analytical and I can bake

Three things you don't like about yourself: My facial flaw, my weight and my ability to procrastinate

Three parts of your heritage: Sorry, there's only two parts: Mexican and Native American

Three things that scare you: Horror Movies, bankruptcy and car accidents

Three of your everyday essentials: Computer, Kid and Food

Three things you are wearing right now: My socks, hubby's sweat pants and a tank top.

Three of your favorite songs: Never Too Far, Crazy In Love & At Last

Three things you want in a relationship: Truth, Trust and Passion

Two truths and a lie: I'm right handed, I'm a moderate cook and I'm athletic

Three things you can't live without: My husband, my son and something to stimulate my mind.

Three places you want to go on vacation: Hawaii, Disney World and Japan

Three things you just can't do: Stop flinching at cars approaching from the side, talking and leave my son in tears

Three kids names: Becky, Jack and Jenny

Three things you want to do before you die: Publish, make a lot of money and finish all my projects

Three celeb crushes: Dean Cain, Eddie Cibrian & Gerard Butler

Three of your favorite musicians: Beyonce, Classic Mariah & Kelly Clarkson

Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeals to you: Masculine hands, a nice ass and sharp eyes

Three of your favorite hobbies: Drawing, quilting and movie watching

Three things you really want to do badly right now: Eat, sleep and write

Three careers you're considering/you've considered: Writing, reviewing, interior design

Three ways that you are stereotypically a boy: I LOVE Football, I can play all sports if needed and I do not see the value of a 500 dollar purse. Ever.

Three ways that you are stereotypically a girl: I love to bake, I sew and I check my reflection often so I don't embarass my companions.

How's that, Rae? :)
Smooches,
Dee

NaNo-NaNo-Boo-Boo!

2005-11-02T10:34:00.000-08:00

Honest, I planned to NaNo. I really, really did. Then I got a request which requires some polishing. So, will be edit-no-ing instead. Have two weeks to get the ms out. Barring annoying medical problems...holidays...kiddie attention requirements and medications...I should be able to do it.

Current editing completed: 0
Needed to Complete: 240pgs

Le Bat! Too sweet! So chic!

2005-11-01T09:26:00.000-08:00

Okay, bad song reference, but a VERY happy Kid!

To view all the project pics in slideshow form or one at a time to read the captions, click HERE!

But the two most important pics are these:

The complete suit--with working Batbelt (actual pockets!)--and the complete boy, with happy smile!

RTB DAY!!!

2005-10-31T06:41:00.000-08:00

Howdy everyone!

Happy Halloween!!

As I'll be frantically finishing the Batman costume, lol, here's wishing you and yours a safe holiday! Since it's RTB Day, I'll just ask that you head on over there (To read, click the button below!) and see my deep thought for the month!

Smooches!
Dee

One a those weeks...

2005-10-30T19:51:00.000-08:00

All right, when I left you Wed, I was anticipating several things to happen.

1) That my body would right itself and I'd feel somewhat normal.

2) That I'd finish the Batman costume and be Supermom.

Welllll...it didn't quite work out the way I planned. BUT, some great things have happened in the interrim.

Thursday:
• I got a call about one of my submitted mss. The editor enjoyed it, but since she couldn't see fitting it into her line without ruining it (I love that she said that), she's forwarding it to another line, where she thinks it will be a much better fit for my voice and my style. This is something that has never happened before in my many years of submitting, so I think I came across as vaguely professional. Speechlessness has the effect of making me sound composed. LOL!

• So inspired, I actually managed to work out Chp 4 of the Vetta project and let me just say...DAYUM!

• The majority of the Bat was constructed. The gauntlets, the cape, the cowl was connected. It was an all-day Mommy attack! Double-dayum! Can't wait to show the pics!

Friday:

• Went to dinner with BIL & SIL and MIL. Interestingly, upon seeing my BIL, Moo pointed and started waving wildly, calling to him, "Uncul! Uncul!" Moo doesn't really identify people by their title. Of course, since we usually go to "Popeye's chicken" for biscuits, he immediately launched into a demand for them, earning BIL the new nickname of "Uncle Biscuits". I have the bad feeling that one will stick, lol.

Saturday:

• I got my hair cut and colored. Mind you, the last time I did this, it was April. I now look and feel less like the red-headed yeti stepdaughter. Four inches of roots at the top and an inch of fried on the bottom...gone. Ahhhhh!

• I had a gangload of books from RWA that didn't quite work for me. I just haven't been in a reading mood and several of them just didn't quite work for me. Went to my bookstore and traded in for nearly 100 dollars in credit. Then, I went in and found some work from some of my favorite authors to inspire me again, as I really need it. So, thanks MUCH to Vicki Lewis Thompson & Stephanie Bond. Devoured "Fool For Love" and I feel better already!

Sunday:

• Chargers won! I'd say more, but y'all would shoot me. Suffice it to say, this is highly exciting and pleasing to me. (Sadly, I missed most of the third quarter because I resorted to the Tylenol with codiene and promptly passed out, but the boys held up in fine style!)

• I found an interesting email in my inbox. An editor found my work--she read my blurbs and samples on my site--and is interested in finding out more about them. Don't worry, she's not from the vanity presses or anything bad. From a reputable pub, though I won't say who at this stage. It could be nothing...but I'm feeling optimistic. (I know, don't pass out or anything.) Will keep you updated.

Now to just get started on the right foot in November.
Smooches,
Dee

Project Updates

2005-10-26T07:45:00.000-07:00

DRUGS: Okay, the sickies got a good grip on the ole ovaries this week. Thankfullly, fever stayed low grade and pain is abating. Sadly, this means sticking to the seemingly useless naproxen. It helps in the long run, but seriously, I feel like I'm dialating in the meantime. It's like losing days of battle so you can win the war. For you men out there, imagine if your nuts turning into bolts--hard, cramped and screeching over each other. To say nothing of the lovely feelings it sends out to your toitoi. :) LOL! At any rate, hopefully it's almost over and I can look forward to the next bout near to Thanksgiving. Whine.

BATMAN: The cowl is made. Just the cape and the gauntlets to work on. Sounds easy, right...yeah....right. Hoping to work on those today.

WRITING: Well, the sisters spoke a little. The next one is starting to whisper. And, of course, the unfinished edits on Vetta are whining. I need some better lithium.

WORK: Still working on the Open House, tracking emails and building January schedule. I can probably finish January today and hopefully get another 50 emails out today. Crossing fingers. Oh yeah, and rounds.

DINNER: Okay, for the last three nights, something has been slightly off with all my cooking. Granted, I felt like crap while doing it for the first couple of days, but last night I was able to stand and not need to curl up on the floor several times. Still, didn't have enough sauce and there are few cooking errors as bad as not having enough sauce. What to make tonight....? Hubby might go for a nice baked mac & cheese, right? Never tried that before. It's always been instant here in Cali but I hear that people make it somewhat fancy in other places. I can put the hot sausage in it, maybe....

Okay, off to see what I can do to get all this done today.
Smooches,
Dee

TTT: General Targeting

2005-10-25T08:16:00.000-07:00

Well, it's Tuesday again folks and for the first time, I don't really have a topic to babble on about. So, I hauled out my notebook of questions and thought it might be a good time to cover a more general topic--targetting.

It sounds like it should be easy. You like a line, your story has characters of the kind they print and they have some adventure of a like type as well. BINGO!

Not even close.

It took me roughly four years to learn how to target properly. And that was to one line. I've now expanded my approach to three. We'll see how it goes.

It's most difficult to know where to begin.

If you ask a lot of writers--particularly the Unpubs--they will tell you to write the story of your heart, find a place for it later. I used to feel this was true, but I have to say, I think it's only half-true. I read somewhere where an author asked, "If it's not the book of your heart, why are you writing it?" I laughed good and hard at that because that question certainly puts it into perspective. "Write what you know" is an equally unhelpful instruction. The reason I don't recommend either one of these as first steps to targeting is that they are misleading. A writer should only invest time in a story they care about--a book of their heart. If it comes from anywhere else, you won't like writing it and no one will like reading it. Don't waste your time. Writing what you know is vague and difficult. Have you ever tried to catalog how much you know? You'd be surprised. (I sure was.) But in list form, it's boring as hell. Write what INTERESTS you. If you're interested in the theme, the topic, the internal conflict...it's a book of your heart. In any event, if you plan on building a career with your writing, you must accept that it's a business. No one wants to pay taxes, but if you plan to make that business last, you need to know how to take care of setting the money aside. Likewise, if you want to write with any longevity, you'll need to learn to aim your writing not just for what you like most, but also where the market heads and for your line's specific needs. Otherwise, they find authors who can.

If you ask any editor, the first step is to read the line. That what you like to read might be what you like to write. But I'm going to have to disagree with that one, too. What you eat is not necessarily what you are. I love to read regencies...I was not meant to write them. Add to that, not every person is a born writer and that has to be taken into consideration.

What you need to think about first is YOU.

If you have always written, you have a style, a voice; however undefined or untrained. What kind of stories do you naturally come up with? Romantic comedy? A murder mystery? Do you like dark and foggy tales or smart, wicked quick plots? Did you keep pairing couples up? Or repeatedly come up with ways to kill someone? Do you write in concise sentences, staccato in rythym? Or do you find your writing has always been descriptive, every sentence designed to be evocative of a particular atmosphere? These are important aspects of writing to consider when choosing a line or imprint to approach. All writers train to write for a line, but if you force yourself to write against your grain, you'll end up with bumpy, choppy flow and you'll be unhappy writing it. To be sucessful, your heart must be in the story, no matter how commercially you come up with it, and you have to respect your own process. No one writes the same or "the right way". A better writer is the one who knows where they flourish. Remember, there's a reason plants turn towards the sun.

If you have never written a word before, or have always daydreamed stories but never attempted to write, things are much more difficult for you. You're approaching writing having abandoned the spectators chair. You're well aware of what you like to read, but writing comes from an internal place. Your first job will need to be finding that. Begin with what you enjoy reading most. Or an author you enjoy reading. Emulate. This doesn't mean copy. It means ask yourself what you like and why. Take those things--"I like how her hero's do this.." or "Her heroines never take any crap!"--and try to come up with a short scene or two that incorporates one at a time. When you feel you've mastered that, try to combine elements. Keep doing that until you have a short story. Then look at what you've done and ask yourself the questions posed above to the experienced writer.

Now that you have a genre, narrow things down by looking for a line there that appeals to you. Then read up on it. I had a mad passion for Harlequin Superromances. It was a large story for a decent cost and given how much and how fast I read, it was the best deal. When I finally considered sending an ms in, I immediately gravitated to Supers. I spent several years banging my head on the wrong wall, reshaping my stories to fit their tone and erasing my own. It took me further and further from publication. Finally, a wonderful ed there told me that I had to choose between a serious tone and the comedic tone underlying every page. It was a gentle way of telling me I was writing against the grain. I was targetting unclearly. It was time to see if the comedy aspect of my writing could lead anywhere--low and behold, I found a niche I fit into at Temptation. Writing for your voice is just as important as knowing what is out there. One tends to lead to the other.

Next, you'll find that several people tell you disect the books you like. To my mind, this is a lot like disecting your pet. Please don't do that. I'd suggest picking up books you've never read to disect them. This will teach you to separate your reading mind from your writing one and give your various approaches to the same line. It's important to be able to retain your ability to taste apart from your own cooking. I saw a french movie once where a man cooks for a chef. She asks him if he used a particular brand of sugar. He says, "There's no way you can tell which kind of sugar I used." Her reply? "No, but I can tell what kind you did not." You will hopefully become this adept with a line, but not if you stick with the things you enjoy. Taste to find what you do not and learn to avoid adding it.

Once you have factored in your natural voice and then researched lines to which that voice might lead you, you're all set to plot. Pantser or plotter, you still need a general idea of what you're going to write and who you will write about. Targetting involves lining your writing elements up in a certain order. Tone, action, characterization and language must all match, like suits of cards. You CAN create a straight flush with unmatching suits, but something will be off about the compilation to the reader's eye. An example would be a smart-mouthed, one-lining detective in a serial murder case that isn't remotely a comedy. It could be a great plot, a brilliant mystery...but that off-suit characterization will unbalance the entire thing and leave it discordant. If the elements harmonize, you give the editor a better reason to believe this is a story they want.

If you'll forgive one more metaphor, targeting your writing is much the way a lawyer puts a case together. The editor is your judge. The burden of proof is on you to provide evidence that you know what you're doing. If you aim your elements, your story and your writing in a particular direction, you build the case word by word. Leave something important out, add something that doesn't belong, and the ruling goes against you. Conscious targeting--at any stage--makes you a better writer and takes you several steps closer to selling. Or...you could always do what I did and spend years knocking on the wrong door.

Whatever works for you.

Fun With Dee & Pain

2005-10-24T08:03:00.000-07:00

I am a writer. What I am not is a chooser.

One of hubby's pet peeves is that I don't have a food drive. Most people have an idea what they want to eat. Particularly when they're starving. I can be verging on complete collapse (hypoglycemic) and not have a bloody, blinkin' clue. I, like my poor kid, am a product of advertising. I see a billboard and go, "Oh, I'll eat that!" Comercials never fail with me. I am one of those pathetic souls who probably COULD be hypnotized into clucking in public. I am, not to put too fine a point on it, a Suggestion Slut.

So, when it comes to choosing a new project, I am overwhelmed with confusion. Add to this that I have multi-genre ideas and I'm flat out screwed. My last three projects were chosen by an editor and I was quite happy with that. But she's not going to be interested in choosing for another line and she's already got her plate chock full of stuff from me. Which means I need to do this on my own.

And you SOOOOO know that's not going to happen. So, here's the deal: Y'all get to choose for me.

Oh yes, I'm going to give you the briefest logline and genre and whatever wins the vote--provided more than three people make a vote--I'll work on next. The choices are:

Erotica/Comedy: When an unhappily oversheltered woman learns that her brother thinks he can arrange a marriage for her, she goes out for a little revenge.

Erotic/Comedy: He thinks she's morally corupt. She thinks he's a highhanded schmuck with cement up his crack. And yet, they keep falling in bed together. Which wouldn't be a problem if they'd managed not to get caught...

Single Title/Thriller: When the only clue to why someone is trying to kill you is the beautiful assasin you've caught in the act, how far can you trust her to lead you to the truth?

Single Title/Paranormal: Four sisters, one gift that effects them all. Can they hide from the magic in their blood? Or will their fate be the same as those doomed before them?

Okay, closing my eyes and hoping for the best,
Dee

Sunny Lyn Saves The Day!

2005-10-22T14:40:00.000-07:00

Now, she's way too nice to put it into print that she was helping me. But I admit it. I know a lot of writing tips, but it's more likely that I'd be able to give up sex, hugs and pie than it was that I'd be able to write an even slightly interesting or effective synopsis. I suck at them. I write stories, dammit. If I could tell them concisely do you really think I'd be a novelist??

At any rate, I finished my synop and gave it to my CP to crit. I won't be sitting for the next few days and I couldn't even argue with her. She was right. (Savor the flavor, X, I don't say that too often.) So, this morning I sat down and knocked on poor Lyn's door with my pathetic tale of woe. "Sunny, I'm lame...I'm LLLLLAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMME!"

Thankfully, she's seen this before and responded accordingly. Somehow or another, in a few hours, she got me to write a 1 page synopsis...before you fall down in shock, it not only makes sense and tells the whole story...it's INTERESTING! Blow me down. (Any way you wanna take that, folks!)

So, I've met one of my goals, I have submitted to EC. Sadly, that means I must update my website, lol, which I was happily avoiding this month. So, I guess that means I have to finish my edits on this story and prepare myself for NaNoWriMo next month.

I'm a moron, aren't I? LOL!
That's okay, too happy with having submitted to feel bad about it.
Dee

Holiday Gear Ups

2005-10-22T08:13:00.000-07:00

I saw something odd yesterday. A Canadian friend was touting herself "In the Season". She thinks it's the Christmas season. I think she's slightly out of her mind. I'm still trying to get past Halloween without overeagerly making a turkey to practice Thanksgiving. I LOVE Thanksgiving. But I'm not ready for it.

Is it me or does the year start to speed up right about now. Months fly by, stuff doesn't get done and money just pours out of the hands. It gets harder and harder to focus and whining prevails. I'm working on avoiding the whining, but I wouldn't hold my breath if I was you.

Speaking of...I finished my Synop. Which is to say, I completed a totally useless work of words. My CP said that you can tell I wasn't having fun writing it. My dillema is this. Editors say, make it interesting. Tell us what happpens, but don't just give us a "this happened, then this happened, then this happened" account. Show some voice.

Then the accomplished Syn writers say to be sure to inform of the GMC and the hooks. Good points, both. Include turning points and plot points. Sounds good too. Be concise. Uh... Be unique, stand out. Whimper!

Well, my CP got to ream me and chew me up and spit me out. And she's right to. But I think it's goiing to take something of a miracle for me to do all these things and be interesting as well as show voice. And seriously, what sadist decided to make them in present tense? Geez.

Smooches,
Dee
(PS--CYNTHIA: I found you some gloves for your Cinderella costume. Cheap! Check out the comments on the last post, left you a link.)

Momma and the Machine

2005-10-20T09:02:00.000-07:00

Sadly, there's nothing erotica in THIS post.

Okay, so, Moo wants to be Batman. I found a pile of black leatherette for five bucks. Suuuuure, I can make the Cape and Cowl!

What was I thinking??

Well, It took all day--and some of this morning, but the cowl is all but built. The tricky part? Well, currently, it's the ears...who knew those bat ears were so hard to get right? But interestingly, it's been getting the size of Moo's head right. I had it set to be a seamless looking head shaping cowl. Well, the boy's head is somewhat round. Particularly to the back. The curves--already evil when sewing--proved to be most difficult. The pattern I designed would work for an adult, but proved way too large for the boy. So, in taking it down, I discovered to cup his head, my curves had to be completely different. I've taken pictures just about every step of the way. When the costume is complete, I plan to post them all here so you can see the journey from pile of fabric to happy kid on Halloween. I hope.

Now how to attach that cape....

TTT: External Conflict: The War Room

2005-10-18T08:37:00.000-07:00

An Addendum to last TTT, for another angle at Internal Conflict that I didn't cover--but boy, do I wish I'd gone into that particular specific--take a look at Julie Cohen's Blog. She discusses IC as a state of mind--self-esteem, etc--that is not brought upon by singular incidents. I still hold that ultimately, IC is an inability to trust, either in one-self or in others, but Julie has great insight here and it's worth your time to check it out.

And now, onto External Conflict.

If Internal Conflict is the battlefield, EC is most assuredly the War Room of your particular book. In military terms, the War Room is where people decide if you live or die, where decisions are made for the soldiers, either against them or for them to carry out. As a writer, the War Room is your tool to make those decisions that will effect the overall war your characters are having with themselves. Don't fool yourself, if your character is not at war morally, physically or emotionally with themselves and others in the course of your book, you're not writing a complete story and that's going to cost you.

The essence of EC is my very favorite catchphrase in writing. "Trample, Trample, Trample". Have you ever gone to a party and someone says something horribly crass or accidentally mentions the ex in front of the new wife? The afflicted will blanch, their mouth will tighten incrementally and they'll try to smile it off, but you know that they were effected. That, my friends, is trampling. In real life, you feel really bad when you do it. In romance, it's the stuff that awards are made from.

An External Conflict is a situation that puts your character in an untenable position. Every decision will have a cost that your character is in someway unwilling to pay. The trick to making EC work for your book is to offset the Internal Conflict of your characters with it and use it to poke, stab and punch their issues. EC is their problem, IC is their weakness. Your job as the writer is to make your characters as uncomfortable as you possibly can so that they will face their inner demons to achieve their goals. If you have a character who hates to fly, stuff them into a plane. If you have a character who hates dogs, drop them into a warehouse full of them on guard duty. Say it with me, "Trample, Trample, Trample".

Depending on what line you're writing for, EC has differing levels of importance. Sometimes, it's cliché; nothing more than a veiled prop to set your characters in action. Hero cannot acquire fortune unless he proves he is capable by living without money for a month. Or, heroine will earn grant for her dream business if she agrees to spy on her boss for his investors. A very light conflict that can be overcome by simply telling the truth--if you're willing to sacrifice the things you want for the value of love. This is a great romance staple and there's nothing wrong with it.

But if you want external conflict that is going to last you the length of a full size novel or anything over 55,000 words, you will need EC that has depth, has teeth and taps into your characters weaknesses. Find their weakest point and put them in a situation that attacks it. Then make it worse. Do not give them the ability to balk from it or escape it; but feel free to let them try. More importantly, don't ask the reader to believe that their inner heroism is what forces them into the choices they make. They won't buy it.

People are heroic when they need to be, usually by instinct. No one runs into a burning building just because it's on fire. They run in because they know someone in there can be saved. Or should be. That's the difference between being heroic and being stupid. Stupid characters deserve to burn; heroic ones deserve to come out alive. It's the one time in life when you get to be Justice. Choose wisely.

Late To The Party...

2005-10-17T12:35:00.000-07:00

Well, it appears I've caught up to my committments, for the most part. My house is clean, my kid has been diagnosed (shockaroo, folks, he's autistic! *GASP!*--actually, the dr was quite nice and agrees that Moo has come incredibly far--, and the bigger surprise, the laundry is done. I've even managed to get back on track with work. Now the only thing I'm behind on?

Writing, of course.

I simply have to redefine my daily schedule. I'm a morning writer. That's just the way it is. Hubby, kid, yes, even the sibling, get in the way at night. I can multi-task, but writing takes full bore focus. Even editing. Maybe especially editing. But if I write in the morning, my blog time shifts to nights. Which brings me to today's subject.

Do you ever feel that you blog too late in the day? Or, by the time you get to the blogs you want to read, they've been commented like mad and you feel like you're only saying what's already been said? What time is too late to blog hop? Is there a such thing?

We need more fun around here...

2005-10-13T09:40:00.000-07:00

So, here's an interesting contest Tanya found and I'm outright stealing because I got such a good score, lol.

You Have Your PhD in Men

You understand men almost better than anyone.
You accept that guys are very different, and you read signals well.
Work what you know about men, and your relationships will be blissful.

How Well Do You Understand Men?

Try it out!
Dee

We Knew It Was Going To Happen Sometime...

2005-10-13T07:54:00.000-07:00

We all knew I was gonna drop a ball sometime. I just packed a few too many things into my week and BAM...there goes the schedule.

The Author Day--which went great!--took a big chunk of the day. Plus regular Harlequin work. Then the upcoming Winter Open House plans...all of which could have knocked me off, but then we added a few things.

Moo has a neurology appt this week--still have to fill out the paperwork--to grant him an official Autism medical rating. Oh, and he has the day off school--Why, God? WHY??--so the boy starts his weekend..now. Whimper. Add to the fact that no one will be looking for the TTT this late in the week and I'm thinking we'll just have to come back to it next Tuesday.

Sorry to disappoint!
Dee

Meme'd

2005-10-12T21:23:00.000-07:00

Both Tanya and X tagged me and has finally proven with utmost judiciousness...that I'm the most boring soul in the blogsphere.

I've been given the Meme challenge, which goes as follows:

1. Delve into your blog archive.

2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).

3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).

4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions. Ponder it for meaning, subtext or hidden agendas…

5. Tag five people to do the same.

My 23rd blog entry was the Introduction To The Seven Deadly Sins

Fifth sentence?: "Then, once I came up with the outline, I realized it had to be seven completely separate articles, each one concentrating and detailing the most serious mistakes that universally contribute to rejections and returned manuscripts."

It couldn't have been the Poo with the lights on post, could it? Nope. Cause that would imply something interesting, lol. No mysteries there, or hidden meanings. Whimper.

Worse, I can't tag anyone--all my buddies with blogs have done it. LOL!

Smooches,
Dee

AUTHOR DAY!!!

2005-10-11T10:08:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone!

In honor of today's Belfry Collective Author Day, the Tuesday Teach Day will be postponed until tomorrow. :) But please, be sure to check out the day's festivities! (You'll be joining the Author Day's Yahoo group and getting a whole host of excerpts and prizes!)

World Clock Configuration: (In order for us to coordinate the Aussie & American contingents:)
6 am New York (EST) = 8 pm Canberra, Australia

6 am-7 am– Sweet Romance & Confessions, Highlighting Gerrie Shepard

7 am-8 am Women’s Fiction & Christmas Stories. Hosted by Gerrie Shepard
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Bobby Cole, Gerrie Shepard, and Merry Stahel

8 am-9 am Time Travel, Mystery, & Intrigue Hosted by Merry Stahel
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Merry Stahel, Donica Covey, and Liz Wolfe

9 am-10 am Erotic Romance Hosted by Lyn Cash
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Lyn Cash and Ann Wesley Hardin

10 am-11 am Romantic Suspense and Thriller Hosted by author, Liz Wolfe
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Liz Wolfe, and Bronwyn Parry

11 am–Noon Mainstream and Suspense. Hosted by author Merry Stahel
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Bobby Cole, Donica Covey and Shara Jones

12 pm-1 pm Suspense and Mainstream cont. Hosted by author Shara Jones
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Shara Jones, Sheila Holloway

1 pm-2 pm Hen lit and Chick lit Mysteries. Hosted by author Liz Wolfe
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Liz Wolfe and Bobby Cole

2 pm-3 pm Romance, Mystery, & Mayhem. Hosted by author Shara Jones
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Heather Rae Scott, Liz Wolfe and Lyn Cash

3 pm-4 pm Another hour of Erotic Romance. Hosted by author Lyn Cash
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Ann Wesley Hardin, Lyn Cash, and Alexis Fleming

4 pm-5 pm An hour with an Aussie flavor. Hosted by authors Alexis Fleming and Bronwyn Parry
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Alexis Fleming, and Bronwyn Parry.

5 pm-6 pm = Erotic and Sexy Romance. Hosted by Christine Zubko
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Dee Tenorio, Kris Starr, and Christine Zubko

6 pm-7 pm Contemporary Romance. Hosted by Christine Zubko
Authors highlighted in this hour are, Dee Tenorio, Donica Covey, and Christine Zubko

Belfry Day!

2005-10-10T08:56:00.000-07:00

I know, I've neglected y'all this weekend. I'll be better, promise.

But, today's blog will be posted on The Belfry Collective Blog!

Pop on over and give me what-fer!

Smooches,
Dee

Bad Dreams, Big Headaches

2005-10-06T12:25:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the late post, folks. Believe it or not, I was up early. REAL early. 2:30 am, to be exact.

I've always had a problem with nightmares. I blame my sister, who enjoyed making "Jason" sounds around my bed in the dark while we were growing up. She's ever so slightly sadistic. But, she also ran right into a pole and gave herself a goose-egg that left a permanent curve to her forehead she wasn't born with while we were playing tag. So, I'm calling it even.

So, there I am, in the dark, fairly sure there's something standing in my bathroom that shouldn't be there and afraid not to look, in case it moves. These are the idiot things I do when I wake up in the middle of the night. My one burst of courage was to reach past hubby to turn the light on to it's lowest setting. He didn't stir, which meant I'd have to purposely wake him up. Since he gets to sleep four hours a week, even I couldn't justify waking him up for a dream that didn't involve a gut reaction to imagined infidelity. So, I turned to my other lover...my laptop.

We have a great relationship, my other lover and I. It sleeps next to my bed, waiting for my loving attention. You can watch the little sleep light brighten and dim like it's sleeping, honest. I turned to it, then, of all things, I went to work. Yup, I did message boards rounds. Startled the Aussies, who were pretty sure I'd never be there at that hour. Then, and this is how you know I'm a sick puppy...I started writing.

Something about waking up from nightmares and writing always makes me feel like Mary Shelley.

Of course, she wrote a massive piece of classic work that remains a cornerstone of literature. I wrote about a couple freaking out after unexpected sex. Still, I bet Mary wished she had my laptop, so again, we're even.

If you're wondering where I'm going with this post, so am I. I have a headache three miles wide, I don't really intend to make a lot of sense but it's nice to know that no matter how afraid of the dark I am, how out of my head...I still can see that little sleeping light and know I can hide in someone else's world. And if they're having good sex while I'm there, well all the better. :)

Smooches,
Dee

TTT: Internal Conflict: The First Battleground

2005-10-04T08:49:00.000-07:00

My CP mentioned that if she struggles with anything in her writing, it's internal conflict. There were some specific questions presented and she asked if I could possibly come up with some answers for her. I figured it was a fairly good Tuesday Teach Day topic and so, here we go.

1) What the hell is it?
2) What are we supposed to do with it?
3) How do you know if your IC is strong enough?

Now, some of you might be giggling, but you'd be surprised how something like Internal Conflict can mess with people's minds. I've found in some reading around that IC, while a huge element we all need to get a good handhold on, that many people have somewhat different definitions. I find that problematic for the studying writer. The reason that comes about is that different authors want to include shades of what IC can do for your characters in their definitions.

I like to keep things simple: Internal Conflict is, definitively, a single character's mental obstacle that disables their trust.

That does not mean that IC doesn't serve several purposes. But, if you want a definition that is clean and concise, that's what you need. One character. One main personal obstacle to contend with. Each of your central characters should have an internal conflict, preferably with some meat to it. Secondaries are welcome to have one as well, but it's not as important to the story. Don't get hung up on them.

Let's look at the common IC types. There are two major categories: Old Wounds and New Fears.

Old Wounds: These are both the most likely and the most often clichéd aspects of romance. Old Wounds are things that happen to your character in the distant past, usually childhood. Second most common is the Old Wound acquired in a previous marriage (which, reportedly, is ravagingly scarring). This type of internal conflict usually has something to do with the inability to trust others for whatever reason.

Childhood wounds are deeply ingrained in your character. When you use this kind of IC, think of it as a stain. It goes deep into the wood, into the flesh, of your character. You can use all the polish you want to cover it, paint to hide it, but if the wood has a warp, nothing you do to it will take it out. Every decision is weighed by them through that stain, through that warp. A character can choose to look past the automated stain filter, but it's a choice to be rational. The knee jerk reaction will always come first.

For example, abused children who grow into heroes and heroines will view people with a certain level of suspicion until it's proved they are "safe". More so if you have a sexually abused character. This is how they trained to survive at a formative level. Love will change them, but the older your wound, the less likely it is that they will magically become trusting and open. Love HEALS. It doesn't turn back time.

New Fears: This kind of IC is best used with characters in the midst of a personal crisis. They knew who they were and they are currently facing a drastic change that makes them question everything they know. In this case, the internal conflict is the inability to trust themselves.

New Fears can involve characters such as athletes that are suddenly paralyzed or forced into retirement. Intelligent professionals who find themselves unable to recall entire blocks of time or are coming to realizations as to the consequences of their previous choices. (This is particularly good for the surprised father of a secret baby.) Reconciling husbands and wives often face this kind of IC, leaving them to wonder what their responsibility for previous failures might be. New Fears is entirely about uncertainty.

Just like Old Wounds, New Fears creates a stain on the character, however this is generally more of a surface stain. It does not go bone deep and is surmountable. The inner core of the character will out. They have an ingrained sense of self that has been shaken, not destroyed. The challenge for a character with this type of IC is to realize that. Love will often see them through. It will strengthen their courage to face their new fears. Beware of putting your characters in a position where they do not face their new fear internally. It's a great temptation to use the new love as a crutch. The character must regain their faith in themselves as they overcome their New Fear or the IC is not resolved.

Now that we know just what the hell it is, let's discuss how to use it.

Thankfully, this is far easier to explain. IC is the pair of sunglasses your character sees through. It will color their reasoning for their decisions. Many times, a character will go the long way around rather than face their IC head on.

I know plenty of people will argue with me, but IC needs to be seen as part of a character's motivation. It is WHY they are willing or unwilling to do something. The other side of motivation is the External Conflict--a situation that puts the character in a position where they MUST do something. These two, for the purposes of your story, need to work intrinsically to move your character across the story canvas. Just like driving a stick, you've got your foot on the clutch and on the gas. As one pedal rises, the other will be pushed down. Hit them both and the car stalls. Apply one too much and the other not enough, and the car stalls. Apply pressure in a yin-yang equation and you've got a car that gets you somewhere.

For example, you'll need to establish the internal conflict--hero was an abused child, he fears being as dangerous to children as his parents were to him--then present the external conflict--former lover dies, leaving him to raise the child he didn't know they had. The hero has a viable concern about the child's safety, but he bears responsibility for the child. Apply pressure to the IC--kid is a baby and screams all night long. Pull back on the EC--he's been told that if he can watch the child for one night, a social worker can see him in the morning about placing the child elsewhere, providing relief. Switch. Man manages to get the kid to sleep without throttling it, he's exhausted but feels he's passed a test. Until he discovers that the social worker cannot take the child until a suitable home is found...that she'll be checking on him and the child daily in the interrim, but that it could take a few weeks. The relief is gone, the stakes are now higher. Repeat.

At every stage of increasing the stakes, the tension is higher for the character, forcing him to face his ingrained wound in both a situational and emotional level. Remember, because no one wants to face their fears, your character is going to fail to overcome, which will tighten the noose of the IC on them, especially as the stakes keep rising. And failure needs to have consequences equal to the level of failure. For our example hero, losing his temper with the child might have him break something the child sees, or slam a door or yell at the child directly--proof to himself that he's no better than his parents--and he might even leave the child in someone else's care so that he can escape the pressure. Upon his return, however, the social worker would have seen the ample evidence of his failure and applied more pressure and/or guilt by either upping the stakes with an ultimatum (taking the kid away, which is suddenly a frightening thought instead of a blessing) or reminding him that his responsibility is to the child, not himself. Laws of physics apply to literature: For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

My CP did mention a particular concern in how to apply IC--can it be derrived from the External Conflict or the situation they are in? Sadly, the answer is no. An Internal Conflict must come from INSIDE the character. Whether the situation exists or not, your character will have this ISSUE. They are IMBUED with it. I capitalize these words so that you can use them as keys to remember what Intenal Conflict is.

A woman who has had her trust in her husband damaged will have that trust issue with him no matter if he is gone, part of her life or reemerging into it. The story is, for that character, the way they face their issue, how it colors their decisions and how they overcome it. At least, that's why people are reading it.

So, how do you know if your character's IC is strong enough?

Sadly, there's no litmus test that will tell you if the IC is ripe and ready to sell. But ask yourself these core questions. If you can't answer one or the answer strikes you as something you'd smack your friend for thinking because it's lame reasons to justify poor decisions, then you might want to tighten it up.

1) What kind of IC does my character have?
2) Have I shown it--at least to the reader--prior to presenting the situation (EC)?
3) Does my character have established reasons for this IC?
4) Do I show where the IC effects which choices they make?
5) Do I challenge the IC anywhere in my MS? Does my character fail to overcome it prior to the plot climax? Are the consequences equal and opposite?
6) When my character struggles with his IC, is it melodramatic or effective? Does he ever make progress and lose ground?
7) When my character does overcome, have I made it a permanent change to his nature? Does that seem believable considering the amount of time my character has had his IC?

With any luck, you'll now have a better understanding of your characters IC and how to apply it. Go out and torment.

Next week: External Conflict: The War Room

Walkin' The Walk

2005-10-03T10:20:00.000-07:00

Hubby and I were talking yesterday, one of our rare walking and talking kind of evenings when neither of us was umbilically connected to our computers, and I brought him up to speed with my evil plot to become an erotica author.

Hubby, to say the least, is amused.

It's not that he doesn't find me sexy--I'm hot, dammit!

It's not that I'm not at least decently creative in our bedroom--double joints, baby.

What it is--oddly enough--is that he's not sure I can pull off the Skank Factor.

See, before any heads go blowing off (no pun intended--though there probably should be, might lose a point for that), to be an Erotica author, I'm discovering you have to be somewhat fearless. You've got to be comfortable using language that will scare your mother. You have to be at peace with describing sexual positions in graphic terms and make it good enough that your reader needs a cigarette and/or a man. Immediately. I'll have to not blush with my sexual innuendo. Not lower my voice when I use the gutsy phrases. And, most importantly, I have to have a pair of big brassy balls that enable me to get down an dirty. I have to develop a Skank Factor.

Now, I've listed that I'm pragmatic. I'm a mother of an autistic child. If I value my sanity, I wear a lot of knits, sweats and easy wash, who cares about the stain products. I'm allergic to most chemicals, so I rarely wear make-up. I have hair that needs to be ironed to look like anything other than a rat's nest. (Contrary to all that, I can still work up the occasional HOT status) But I have to admit to quite a bit of naiveté. I try to reason out fetishes (Will someone PLEASE explain why Furries exist??), I have to have diagrams to figure out a complicated position and I'm usually the person that goes, "Ohhhhh!" about fifteen minutes after a sexual reference in a movie. Hubby is probably right to wonder if I can do this. He questions that I have the natural impulse to consider or imagine something outside my comfort zone.

However, Hubby doesn't totally know the deviousness of my mind. And no woman ever divulges all her personal thoughts, desires and fantasies. For all he knows, I have an undying desire to run the Great Wall of China stark nekid to a sea of men at the other end. (Not likely, but I COULD!) So, I'd say I have a fifty/fifty shot--provided I do my research and toss off my inhibitions on the page and maybe a little bit in real life.

To that end--and this I think y'all might get a kick out of--hubby and I are keeping score.

All actions, impulses and remarks I make are now being judged for Skank Factor, lol. Points are lost for nervous giggling or blushing. So, when I make a dirty joke, I gotta do it like a pro. Have earned about 3 Skank Points this weekend.

I'm thinking if I can hit 100 in a day at some point, lol, I'll be Uber-Skeeze and worthy of some Skanky Respect. (I wonder if I'll get dinner with that?)

Smooches,
Dee

Mooness

2005-09-29T09:42:00.000-07:00

Howdy everyone!

As you know, I generally take a day to discuss me and my son. He's what you'd call a unique little boy. Sadly, this week he's fairly typical and has gotten a bitter taste of second grade.

Yes, the boy done caught a bug.

Then he brought it home to share.

A form of rotovirus, which means even if nothing goes in him, something is coming out. Violently. Thankfully, as I'm the only one who handles the boy when he's turned his fluids into a projectile, I have more antibodies than him and appear to be keeping most of my business to myself. But, I have the low grade fever and according to the doctor, we should both expect it to last a few weeks. The bonus is that most likely will lose weight. Ah well.

Anyhoo, so I mentioned that I would be posting some of Moo's fabulous feats. First off, this week we actually got him to attempt to eat a carrot. And took photos for posterity.

Carrot piece came out of his mouth in record time, but he actually bit into it!

Also here is some close ups of Moo's Kinnex plane. He tried to build the one in the booklet, but found it either too basic or simply too much a waste of his playtime. So, he stripped it down and redesigned himself a plane from scratch. The only pieces that anyone else designed were the four far corners of the wings. He wanted a cargo plane with some three-dimensional body and an undercarriage. It took him one month and three designs to come up with this one so that the tail had support. It's been intact since July 4th. Not bad for a seven year old, considering that Mommy and Daddy were not allowed to help and he's been known to sleep with it.

Smooches,
Dee

Crossed Wireds

2005-09-29T08:35:00.000-07:00

Forgive this extra post, folks, if you could. Was having signal problems and found that when it posted, I didn't know aboutit and it included someone else's text.

Very, VERY weird.

Smooches,
Dee

The 1st Deadly Sin: Implausibility

2005-09-27T10:34:00.000-07:00

“The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.”--Tom Clancy

If you want to know what the most Deadly Sin in writing of any kind is, I want you to check out the trash can closest to your favorite reading area. Once you’ve located it, check the wall for scuffs and dents. These have probably been made by you throwing your book--as hard as you can--into the trash. What would cause that? Make you damage your own wall with satisfying dents and multicolored smears? The leading reason a book is rejected, my friends.

Implausibility.

Sure, you can argue that the entire romance genre is “unlikely” at best. That gorgeous looking man who smells good, cleans his house and his feet, loves his dog, dreams of children and wants to be with down-to-earth us might not exist. That we’re creating fantasies and while we’re at it, we should dream for the stars.

But I’d still smack you down.

The best fantasies are the ones that seem real. Even the wildest dreams can be believable if the viewer is immersed in things they can accept along with things they cannot. It’s sort of like when your child cleans the house spotless, does their homework without being told and asks for extra veggie portions at dinner. That kid is either up to something or covering it up. You just don’t buy that you’ve got the greatest kid on the planet. Why would you expect readers to believe the same kind of thing?

Let’s begin with identifying what makes something implausible. How “neat” is your story? By this I mean, how many things tie themselves up into perfect little bows, like little presents of perfection? Life ain’t neat, pieces rarely tie together quickly or easily. The presentation should never be “perfect”. Take a look at these elements and see how your manuscript adds up.

Inciting incident: Do characters and situations just happen to come together? Is there a reason other than “fate” why they meet? Does your FBI heroine just feel like investigating in a certain area or is she sent there for a specific reason?

Characterization: Do your characters have all the same interests to explain why they like each other? Have you exposed any depths of them to the other to provide sexual tension, or is that created completely by physical reaction? When they claim to be in love, can they tell the other character why without mentioning a single body part?

Plot: No matter how complicated your plot needs to be--a romantic comedy or a single title mystery--you need to be sure that there are no magic wands involved. Your plot is the spine of your book, enabling it to stand and walk. If it hangs on information falling into the hands of the primary characters at just the right time, you’d better have something better than luck to explain it. Bad guys don’t have magical changes of heart. Heroes and heroines don’t just throw away the chances of a lifetime without some regrets, remorse or reasoning. How you build your plot is just as important as how you resolve it.

Situations: Remember the slasher films? Bubbly bodacious blonde bombshell in babydoll bumbles into basement...and evil, undead killer? Dozens of movies worked that in and dozens upon dozens of times you rolled your eyes. No woman in her right mind--and lets face it, how often are the stupid that brave?--is going to make such a moronic decision. Judge the decisions your characters make by the same stick. Is the situation cliché? Does it lead down a path you’ve read in dozens of books (ie: rugged and brilliant adventurer saves bookish heroine from sure death, leading her into a forest/jungle/vast wasteland of some sort where they can run for a few days, making sure to be uncomfy, tired, dirty, oh and don’t forget aroused. Generally sex occurs, leading reader on secret baby or heroine afraid of committing to dangerous man plotline.)? Do your characters NEED to be there or are you just putting it in because it sounds good?

Motivations: This is a killer almost every time. Why are your characters doing what they do? There are three options:

1) Internal Conflict: They are motivated by things that happened in their past.

2) External Conflict: They are motivated by someone manipulating them in the present.

3) Because that’s what it says in the script.

Best described as the issues that haunt your character and prevent them from moving forward with their relationships, IC is a cliché graveyard. One of these days, I’m going to write down the IC of each character in each of my keeper shelf books. Just to see how many have the same problems--Physical Abuse as a child or spouse; Mate cheated on them and they’ve lost respect/interest for the opposite sex, but might still be convinced in sleeping with them; Inability to commit because they had no good examples as parents and fear damaging partner & as yet invisible children.

IC is mental and extremely important to your character’s motivations. It dictates why they make certain decisions and run away like their hair is on fire (at least emotionally) in others. If you give your character a paper thin internal conflict--read as cliché--so that it’s easier for you to write or understand them, you will find their motivations will not be clear. They will overexplain why they are making decisions because the reader would question them otherwise. Big clue here: If the reader needs to be explained to in depth as to why a character is making a decision, it should ONLY be when the character is shifting and changing to a healthier mindset. If they still explain things that are in character for them to do based on their internal conflicts...you either need to add some beef to that conflict or trust your reader--and your own writing--to know without being bludgeoned.

External conflict is an unfriendly beast to many. EC is what is making your character’s life so hard right now. It is the situation they cannot escape. It is usually complicated by their internal conflicts. Hero is afraid of heights. He’s been ordered to work security in a gala affair at the Space Needle...in the restaurant at the top. He’d prefer not to do this job, especially without explaining his phobia. Except his daughter is kidnapped and being held inside. He now has a serious external situation--the kidnapping--complicated by his internal conflict--admitting he has a fear.

The best way to handle EC is to really pour it on. Layer by layer, chapter by chapter, add to the tension by upping the stakes. Reveal that the hero cannot leave this situation to anyone else because.... Hammer him over the head with escalating opportunities to overcome his fear--jumping a gap high off the ground, placing the daughter within his reach if he can just get over himself--that he fails.

You see, the more important the mission you character is on, the more at risk and the less availability for escape, the more likely they will be willing to change. Leave them options for getting out of it and they would--like anyone else--take them. Your reader will not believe your hero would rush into the building he fears so deeply if there are dozens of better trained professionals nearby to do the job. He’s risking his daughter’s life for pride? Would you cheer that kind of man on? No. But if there is a singular, all-important reason for him to go in despite his lack of the best skills...then you’ve got a story your reader might be interested in turning the page to.

That third reason? It’s a quote of my father’s for when that bodacious blonde arrives on the scene. It’s what is called “lazy writing”. You want the story to go a certain way and that’s all that matters to you. You must be able to provide a physical drive or an emotional reaction that dictates the decisions of your characters. If you cannot, it’s because it’s in the script. If that’s the case, rejection is in the script as well.

Now, all your elements are passing muster. Your characters have begun their adventure for a reason that makes sense. They go places that have reasonable merit to whatever it is they are trying to achieve. They make their decisions based on emotional reaction dicatated by their internal concerns as well as those of the situation they are trying to find a way out of. You’re doing well. The final hurdle is before you.

What do your characters say?

Dialogue: A great plot and brilliant characterizations can be utterly destroyed by the wrong word choices. Stilted dialogue will make a page turner into a wall banger in ten seconds flat. The ultimate killer is dialogue changes. The absolute worst thing a writer can do is change the way a character speaks, simply because his situation has been resolved. I call this the “My Darling” disease. It’s heinous and evil and yes, if I find out you did it, I will beat you with unsanded sticks.

The “My Darling” disease usually occurs at the end of a book, in most cases. The hero and heroine have survived the rigors of gaining their relationship, perhaps overcome the lies of others, miscues and mortal peril and the hero will take her into his arms, press his lips to her forehead and in all shades of desperation proclaim, “My darling.”

He generally says something after that, but I never find out what because the book is across the room. Preferably in half.

Rule of thumb: If your character wouldn’t use endearments normally, they won’t use them at all--not even for post-coital bliss.

Characters who use the phrase, “Darling” will use it at other points in their lives. It should crop up somewhere in their language prior to the final page. There are plenty of people who use it; I’m told it’s the endearment of choice for Europeans. But it’s not for everyone. “My Darling” isn’t the only bookstopper of that kind. Insert the endearment of your choice. All that matters is if they wouldn’t use one on page 3, they sure shouldn’t use one on page 240.

Another dialogue crime is using dialogue for info-dumping. For exposition, yes; have at it. Have characters discuss their situation and in conversation look for resolution. Use dialogue for plot resolution or emotional catharsis; of course. With my blessings. But do not, for the love all that is holy, have them use it to provide incidental details. A character who waxes on and on about how people know each other, are related, enjoy basket weaving and boating...you will bore your reader to death. They may even beat their own heads in with your book.

Do you have your character walk down halls, down stairs, through the lobby, to the car, down the road, turn left, turn right, wait for the green and finally come to a rest at the house of their hero or heroine? Nope, you’re a smart writer. You don’t need those transitions if nothing is happening in them. You have the character leave work in one line, the next, they pull up at the house. Don’t do the same thing in dialogue. Stick with pertinent facts, slide clues and red herrings in along with voice and personality. The less you overcrowd your dialogue, the more believable it becomes.

That is the final aspect of this Sin. Decide the most pertinent information you need to deliver to your reader. Include that--via each of the above elements--first. Then elaborate with style and texture. Be sure in your editing to refrain from stripping the meat off the bones, leaving only the fluff. Meat is what delivers the nutrients, the proteins, the building blocks of believability to your story. Take them out, spread them too thinly, and your books will not satisfy your reader because the fantasy never becomes real. Master reality and everything else will come together beneath it.

Thanks for spending the last seven weeks with me, I hope this series has given you some insights and possibly helps clear the path on your road to publication.

Best of luck to us all!
Dee

New Leaves

2005-09-26T08:00:00.000-07:00

As promised in my RTB column this month, I am turning over a new leaf. My Writing Anniversary comes up Oct 1st and I'd like to have a correct mindset going into Year Eight. Something positive, since I've been in a funk since July and good lord, y'all must be bored of that.

So, I'm going to set myself some goals, having spoken this weekend with some of my writing buddies, Belfrites ThisChristine and Sunny Lyn. And, I've also heard from several authors that setting goals--provided they are goals that YOU can achieve, not ones that require someone else to make your dreams come true *cougheditorscough*--is a smart way to keep your chin up and your muse healthy. So, to that end, I'm coming up with 5 Goals for myself in the 2005/06 (September-July) season.

• Submit to EC: I've been impressed with the growth of Ellora's Cave/Cerridwen Press. I also write fairly frisky, so this might be a fit that I've been overlooking. I currently have an ms in at Cerridwen and hope to hear something soon. Also, should my Lonnigan Series not pass muster at M&B (it's been there for some time already), I have a feeling that EC would be well suited to it.

•Submit Articles: I'm still slightly nervous about this one, but I do believe that it is a good step to take myself. My CPs and I regularly discuss if I have credentials or not. They argue that my time as a submitting writer and my time working with Harlequin are definitely professional credentials. My thinking is that I need to provide specific publishing credentials. All of us would like this discussion to stop, lol. I have never attempted to sell non-fic, but I think this might be a good step in a new and healthy direction. Topics will be Writing Techniques and Parenting of Special Needs Children.

• Complete Edits On All Unfinished Projects: I have four projects that require editing:

Vetta must have a complete edit, as that one is being submitted to EC by end of September.

The Lonnigans--the edits are written for the First Book, but not imputted, that MUST be done by end of first week of October. Second book should have a read through completed and imputted by final week of October.

Betting Hearts must be edited by Thanksgiving.

• Begin A New MS: Pin down which project I intend to tackle first and make a firm decision as to where I'm targetting. I need to make an order of attack for my submissions, subject only to which Publishing House might take me on. Currently, my submitting cycle is Harlequin, Cerridwen/Ellora's Cave. Should one house pass, I can test it with other houses. I'm also to spend at least one hour of each week researching various publishing houses so that I have a better grasp on what they are looking for and can widen my submitting circle. Should I find success at any given publishing house, I will submit to them first and review which order of houses to submit to should they pass on it.

• Settle The Agent Question: I am something of a versatile author and have several idea pages for multiple genres, which leads my CPs and close writing friends to believe that perhaps an agent is a good choice for me. Since I primarily write category size manuscripts, I may have wrongfully thought that an agent was unnecessary. I'm also exceedingly cheap and I have trouble with the prospect of giving someone up to 15% of my earnings for submitting to places I can submit without them. However, it has become painfully clear that outside of Harlequin and a few other ePubs, I am woefully underinformed as to the market and there are many doors closed to me because of a lack of agent representation. (Or persoanl affiliation with RWA, so I have no access to the services they provide to members)

I have also been under the impresion that I'd be wasting an agent's time because I have not completed a Single Title sized manuscript to send them. Personally, I fear the 100k mark. I've written to that length before, but it was quite some time ago and I can be pretty sure that it was primarily crap on a stick, not to mention padded like cotton candy. The ideas will keep coming and I'm constantly looking to better my plotting skills, but I still shake in my boots at the prospect. For a book that large, the plot must be substantial and the writing needs to be damn, damn good. I will challenge myself not to shy away from completing a full size ST. Should I finish this undertaking--it will remain a side project for the time being--I will definitely need to take on an agent, so that the book can be properly submitted.

I am still very undecided if an agent is something I need to investigate at this stage of my writing and would love some imput from other writers as to when is a good time in your career to consider an agent and a few suggestions of where to look would not be unwelcome. :) What should a person look for when researching them? What is the most important aspect of an agent to you?

Many thanks and Happy Monday!
Dee

"Wishes Are Like Children"

2005-09-23T07:36:00.000-07:00

I was recently asked a not so unusual question...which is why it probably put me into a paroxysm of indecision. At first, I was sure I knew the answer. But then...then the doubts arose and I wondered why I was so sure.

You see, someone asked me which of my manuscripts is my favorite, most publishable, piece of work.

My mind immediately ran to the last ms I wrote, which is hands down my favorite. I loved the characters, they had strong conflicts, they were utter smart-alecks and they were crafty. There's just something about intelligent characters that can really get a writer hopped up. For the first time, the book seems to have everything--characters, motivations, conflicts, depth and the real miracle...PLOT.

But is it my favorite because it's the last thing I wrote? The last complete thing?

Is it my favorite because the writing elements seem to have come together for the first time in my life? Is that more important than the characters inside?

What about the story with the virgin out to drive the town wild? Or the tomboy cum hot chick out to get her best friend? Didn't I love those? Don't I still? Are mss really like our children and we love them equally? Or is that another lie our mother's tell us "for our own good"?

How do you go about picking your favorite piece of work to pitch or just to answer a simple question from a friend?

RTB DAY!

2005-09-22T06:39:00.000-07:00

Howdy everyone!

Today's my first article as a Romancing The Blog Columnist! So, in the immortal words of Jack Black:

"That's all you get for free, Beotches!"
To read Dee, Click the button below!

Hope you like it, I reached to the bottom of my cookie sheet depth for this one. :)
Dee

Horror-scope?

2005-09-21T08:35:00.000-07:00

LOL, so, nothing exciting is going on in my life today that I'm real interested in sharing. I have a work meeting and I'm still avoiding my edits, though I really don't know why. And as I tried to think up something blogworthy, I realized, there's a lot of news out there that I'm all right with seeing and checking in on, but I don't want to hammer it into anyone's brain. I'm not a politcal speaker, so there goes that. How about something fun for people who are depressed enough and will be depressed more in the near future?

So, I thought I'd do the Horoscope Wheel of Fortune and share with you what the "stars" (in various places) are telling me to expect today:

From Yahoo (supplied by Astrology.com):

Quickie) Are you prepared for romance? You'd better be, because one is headed your way.

Response: Actually I'm married. Ten years in November. We're pretty much always in romance. (We make people sick, actually.) Unless this is actually a warning that I'll be writing again soon. Dammit, and I was doing so well at laying here doing nothing!

Overview)
Nobody, but nobody, does earthy sensuality as well as you do it. Play up your romantic self, with the luxurious (yet practical) twist that only you can bring to the whole enterprise. Maybe it's time for a class on massage techniques?

Response: Yes, well, that's true. (Snort) When they say "play up" do they mean put on something that is NOT a pair of sweats and perhaps some make up? Luxurious yet practical...sorry, I'm not getting it. HAHAHAHA @ massage techniques. Did I NOT mention I'm married? I've been giving neck rubs and foot rubs for years. My KID now comes up to me with the lotion bottle and chirps, "Mommy, Wub?" No way is anyone dragging me to a class for it.

Daily Extended Forecast for September 21, 2005)

You've still got it, but then again, did you ever doubt that? Actually, you might have been doing just that -- a recent situation has been leaving you with the feeling that your charisma meter had a busted tube or something. Thankfully, you can dump that attitude right where it belongs and get back to business as usual. The stars are pumping your charm back up where it belongs -- and even higher. This baby goes all the way up to 11!

Response: Well, all right, they get points for this one. I was afraid that I had lost it. I just wasn't sure what IT was. I don't know about charisma, though. If you could see my hair today--picture Frankenstein's wife for kink value--and I think we'd both agree that charisma is not on my list of attributes.

From http://www.daily-horoscopes.com/:

Activities based at home are likely to be more fun than social entertainment. Go easy with credit use and avoid money disputes. Share feelings, plans and POV's this morning; you will be fully accepted.

Response: Oh, thank God! Since I have no plans to leave home today and my credit cards weigh about 50lbs, I should be safe! Talk about good timing! Money disputes...sadly, the only disputes I have about money are with the folks who want it from me. I guess the work meeting will go all right, though...provided I don't talk about money. I wonder if the Boss wrote this one? Hmmmm..... LOL!

From http://www.astrology-online.com/daily.htm :

Someone may be trying to pull the wool over your eyes. Start making things or reusing rather than buying ready made. You may get drawn into a personal situation that will not be to your liking.

Response: I'm sorry...how the HELL do you get THAT from stargazing? Did Saturn do a pantomine that NASA miraculously missed?

From http://www.horoscope.com/ :

Don't let emotional matters escalate. Stay calm; don't believe everything you hear. Don't make a decision based on half-truths and innuendos. Focus on your own advancement.

Response: Hmmm, I'm beginning to see why people think New Agers are flaky. They're not spacey, folks, they're just getting confusing messages from the heavens. So far, I've been told not to talk about money, but to talk about my feelings, that someone is trying to screw me over, so don't buy anything and maybe I should be careful about expressing my feelings because I'll get into a personal situation that will suck, oh, and don't be emotional about the person trying to screw me with this sucky situation, I could be WRONG (how can I be wrong when three horoscopes are POSITIVE that they're trying to screw me?), so don't make any decisions...and while I'm at it, see if I can get something good out of my boss concerning my job...but don't ask for money. Do people really get paid to write these things? Why am I not in THAT field?

Final Daily from http://www.scopes-mart.com/horoscopes.php?use=linked&css= :

AdZe's Fortune Cookie) The power of your personality will make the difference now.

Response: As opposed to yesterday, when it didn't mean shit.

Current Influence of the Inner Planets (Each influence lasts from a day to several weeks.) ) You are ready for the new and unusual. Expect non-conformity and excitement. Offer something better, faster, cheaper, or more efficient.... Go with the flow. Be creative and sexy. Enjoy top notch professional entertainment.... Communication flows well. Organization and negotiation brings favorable agreements.... To get more love, develop your grace, charm and sense of values.... Develop your stamina and physique.

Response: "Be creative and sexy...enjoy top notch professional entertainment..." I'm confused, does this mean BECOME a stripper or just go see one? I'm thinking it means become one, especially after the advice to develop my stamina and physique. What? I could strip in my current state. For all they know, I'm nekkid right now, the insulting bastids.

Current Influence of the Outer Planets (Each influence lasts from a day to several weeks.) ) Get more power by vowing to become a "master."... Improved self-expression is dramatic and subtle. Unique new opportunities bring pleasant surprises. Your best ideas are ready for television.... You are challenged to be charismatic. Express your fantasies. Steer clear of hypersensitive folks.

Response: These are some kinky folks! Apparently, my future is being a dominatrix! I see it now. That would explain the attempts to screw me, above. "Dramatic and subtle" Is that like stripping, but not being a hooker? If I take up this particular new opportunity, I'm sure someone will be pleasantly surprised. Still, I'd like a little practice before I hit TV to express my fantasies. Steering clear of hypersensitive folks should be easy, don't imagine they'd be watching that channel anyway. Now...to just pull this off without ruining my new romance or asking for money.... Or will becoming a volunteer, unpaid stripper intern who falls in love with her boss while dancing my expressed fantasies and points of view be too confusing and lead to that personal situation with the person who wants to screw me that I don't want to be in. Will I make the wrong decision based on half-truths and innuendo, believing our love will never last and ask for a raise, thereby ruining my karma AND increasing the size of my out of shape ass? Is it me, or do y'alll think I could write that and make it a best selling erotica novel? Hey, maybe daily astrolgy WORKS!!

Smooches all!
Dee

The 2nd Deadly Sin: Phraseology

2005-09-20T09:37:00.000-07:00

Phra·se·ol·o·gy (frz-l-j)
n. pl. phra·se·ol·o·gies
1. The way in which words and phrases are used in speech or writing; style.

The Second Deadly Sin is placed here because despite how far you’ve come and gone with your writing, this one sneaks past you every time because you never see it coming. It’s internal to your mind and personality and it’s far more costly than the previous sins--it can effect your readership in advancing stages of your career, particularly after you’ve sold.

Much like Repetition, Phraseology is about word choices. Poor word choices. Remember, a writer’s voice is most often discovered in the strength of their sentences and in how often they use them, as well as to what effect. If the writer relies too heavily on their Voice to flavor the book, they can oversaturate it and leave the reader in search of less intrusive writing.

But how can you tell if your phraseology has gone from flavor and become an impediment?

Let’s begin with characters reflected in word choice. How your characters talk is a major part of how the reader connects with them, decides who they are and if they like them. Their dialogue must make them unique, original. True to who they are and where they come from.

This is not license to go ballistic with ill-placed apostrophes to create dialect--any punctuation used in this manner should be applied with a light hand and very infrequently. It’s a prop and not a good one.

What I mean by being true to who characters are and where they come from is this: look at the depth of your character. A strong willed man who has worked his way from the bottom of the heap will not have indecisive dialogue. He won’t be buried in ellipses, nor will he have many questions to his speech. Some, but not many because he knows what he wants and he’s not--by character--likely to be too interested in the opinions of others. That might change with his story arc, but that would be the choice of the writer and it would be done specifically to show the character’s change. That would be a phraseology choice...and in my opinion a good one.

Similar to reflecting characters in dialogue, you will find that showing who they are through introspection is just as important. You are able to reveal more of them from their own minds, how they think and what they think about. Many authors use these opportunities to show duplicity in their character; a man who would risk all for his own gain...or a man who suffers inside as he sacrifices all to protect those he loves.

The most important aspect of both these types of writing and why they apply to this particular sin is that you use them both to create individual identity for your characters. Don’t muddy the waters by giving them all the same words and phrases to think with.

A favorite writer of mine loves the phrase, “Not a chance.” This works great for decisive heroes. But about the thirteenth book, I realized many characters were using it, and not in the cute inside joke kind of way. Heroines weren’t quoting the heroes to get their goats. They were simply using the same words as he would because that is the phraseology the author speaks and thinks with. Be sure to separate who YOU are from who THEY are, and even more importantly, separate who THEY are from EACH OTHER.

By allowing the writer’s mind to lead each character’s dialogue or introspection and internal monologue, you take the reader out of the story. The book becomes simply a book again. It’s not an adventure, it’s not an escape. The reader is plainly aware of where they are and who they are and can very easily step away from the book or the author. And never return. Why spend money on a book you never connect and you never fully believe? Succinctly? You don’t.

Once you have mastered picking yourself out of the story--but leaving enough of yourself for it to remain alive--you will want to concentrate on whether or not you can strengthen your sentences with stronger verbs. This will help remove you from the ranks of “passive voice” abuser. Make your sentences pop and lock by avoiding adverbs--again, no need to become a Nazi, genocide on any word or structure only weakens your writing; learn to master them and use them properly--and looking for verb choices that concisely express the tension, tone and action you’re trying to convey.

Example:

Jenny ran across the field, desperate to reach the other end.

Better: Jenny raced to the other end of the field.

Always look for the strongest word combinations to convey emotion, physicality, sensory and setting. Even the most boring soul will express response. It’s not what they’re doing or how it’s done that dictates word choice--it’s how you want the character--and thus your reader--to feel about them. Something that should be rule of thumb for all parts of writing.

Next Week: The Deadliest Sin: Implausibility

Fruit Loops: The Adventures of Fat Mom and Round Boy Continue...

2005-09-19T08:53:00.000-07:00

For a kid who doesn't speak with the most fluency, my son is fully capable of making promises he won't keep. This weekend's vow of most solemnency was, "Yes, Daddy, I will eat the Fruit Loops."

Now, you have to understand that in many ways, despite his briliance with things he shouldn't understand (you know, physics, aeronautics, three dimensional space, etc), my boy is a bit behind in some of the kidly enterprises. At age three, he finally began to speak. At age five, he said "I love you" for the very first time. At age six, he discovered what Christmas was on an annual scale. Age seven, he finally recognized that his birthday was Christmas all over again (and there was much rejoicing.). And now, still age seven, but SOOOOO much more advanced...my boy has become subject to commercial brain washing.

He parrots "Five bucks. Circle Round the Good Stuff!". He insists that "GEOX" shoes are for him. (They sell only at Nordstom, so I informed him they most likely will never be for him, but I digress.) He begs for Push pops (blue!) and he's gone on a waffle craze you wouldn't believe. He's being allowed to pick his food, in an effort to get him to try new things. (I keep praying for an onslaught of broccoli commercials, but I don't think The WB will oblige.) And he IS trying them. So, it was only a matter of time before the boy arrived in the cereal aisle and requested a box of cereal.

Lest I berate you with more inane backstory, the kid doesn't drink milk. He was violently allergic, it seemed, as a small baby and since I'm pretty sure his memory is clear all the way back to inception, he has always rejected it on principle. He recently--thanks to Oreo cookie ads--requested a glass to dunk his cookie into. I'm pretty sure the taste was horrid--considering the look on his face--but he ate said cookie and requested never again. But this weekend, my son hugged his blessed box of Fruit Loops and begged his father for them. I was assured that he VOWED to eat them and with a sigh, alllowed them into the cart.

Boy was all a twitter. Fruit Loops! His soulmate, at long last, was found! There were no impatient noises from the back seat. Not until the car stopped with the tiny chirp of, "Fruit Loops?" In an effort not to beat him, because he made up for lost time while the car unloaded and we trudged up the stairs, I poured him a bowl of dry cereal. I did ask about milk, but he rejected with the expression I've come to recognize as the child version of "Are you HIGH??". And so, the boy sat in front of his bowl with a smile that could change the world.

Then he tasted one.

Sadly, I believe my child has bought into the thinking that if it's on TV, it's true. Or worthwhile. He really DOES think that Fruit Loops are part of a good breakfast. He's positive that some where out there, Jackie Chan Adventures really are taking place. He KNOWS that if he checks every bush and tree and pool of water, he will find a pokemon he can crack on the head and make his own.

That first bite of Fruit Loop was perhaps flavored with the vile taste of disappointment. Just what the HELL had his mother done to his wonderful Fruit Loops?? SHE had taken them from obviously delicious to frighteningly dry and hard. He knew it. As if to test this theory on the FL Poisoning, he offered me one. I ate it. Shoot, I ate two, I was hungry. And that, my friends, is when he knew. The commercials had lied. He'd been swindled. And now, he was stuck with a promise he couldn't keep.

So, he put on his brave face and stirred his spoon in crinkling kiddie kibble. But not a loop was eaten.

Does this mean I have a bad kid? Nah. But I do have one who is probably going to rethink his promises a little more before he makes them. As for me, I ate that bowl and hiked my rather large back end onto my exercise bike. I have failed in my quest to manage Resistance 2. So, I switched it back to 1 and set my goals at 10 miles a day. This is doable. :) And hopefully, the back end might fit on the seat some day.

PS: The next day, my valiant boy requested another bowl of gruel. So, I poured the tinkly circles into the bowl and offered to eat one if he did. It took some work--I think his plan is to ask for them, let them go stale and have to be thrown away until the box is empty--but he managed to chew through a loop. He surprised himself. In fact, while his expression was that of a boy licking the underside of horse hooves, he proclaimed the Fruit Loops "GOOD" and proceeded to eat a few spoonfuls. I'm calling it progress. :)

Paper or Plastic?

2005-09-16T07:35:00.000-07:00

Once, a long time ago, I wrote all my stories long hand. Had no choice, it was either that or tie someone up so they could listen to them.

Then, I bought a computer. (This would be the crappy little PC that is still alive in parts at my sister's house...having spread it's evil to my mother's house first. Only the monitor lives, which really does make me think the Midevals were onto something about drawing and quartering their enemies.) At work, I still wrote long hand, then came home and typed things in with mild editing--you know, cause I didn't need more than that. (snort). I really thought that was the way I had to write. It was my process...even if I had horrific tendonitis and even worse handwriting, meaning some days even I couldn't read what I wrote.

We got a newer computer and I kept up my habit. Then, since I was a Stay At Home Mom, I realized I was doubling my time and started typing in directly. This revolutionized my life, even if it was a hard transition. But, since I did have a kid, I still printed out to do my editing. It was a great help, actually, to see it on paper. Things you didn't see on the screen were suddenly so glaringly clear on the page. (Especially those mysterious indent tabs you thought you deleted out.) I could take the whole manuscript with me places and edit in the car, on the couch, at the dinner table. (It's not rude, conversation while we eat becomes dangerous at our house. Hubby bites his tongue or his lip and I gesture broadly...when you have a steak knife, that's just asking for trouble.)

Then we got the laptop. I love my lappy. It fits in my bag and goes everywhere. It's not as ugly as a battered notebook and it's silent typing. Why, I can even bring it to bed while hubby is sleeping and write til I pass out!

But what about editing?

Are print outs still necessary? Am I clinging to the old ways the same way I did with writing longhand? Are the benefits of printing out to edit made obsolete by the lightweight laptop that can be just as versatile as paper,if not more? Is the value of seeing your story on the page worth the cost of ink?

What do you think? How do y'all edit? Do you use paper? Or Plastic encased technology?

Smooches,
Dee

Thursday Thoughts

2005-09-15T07:58:00.000-07:00

I would like to make Thursday a regular thinking day, but that might be asking a bit much of the old braincells. But they're kind of awake today, so I thought I'd just ramble on about what I've been doing this week.

First of all, I am sensing an awakening. My muse is starting to come to from the powerhouse sucker punch she took from my son. (Who knew the chit would have a glass jaw?) I finished the edits on one of my last mss. This is good because I've been attempting to work on it all summer and had to all but rewrite the end. So enamored was I, apparently, of my next book I pretty much wrote crib notes for the last two chapters of this one and had called it a day. I hereby tattoo myself "Moron" and vow never to do that again.

Yeah, I don't buy it either, but I'll give it a good shot.

Also, my beloved Chargers talked themselves out of beating Bill Parcells and the Cowboys. I don't want to say that it was because we didn't have our Tight End who held out and got suspended for Game 1. It's because they forgot that 7 yards to the endzone in 47 seconds is completely possible with a rusher. Especially LaDanian Tomlinson. Run the frick'n ball, Marty. It ain't against the law. But, ultimately, I blame Jammer, our Safety. Hands off, honey, should have learned that in high school when the gals started slapping you.

Other than that, I've been noticing that I'm slowly but sure scraping off my bitterness. It's a thick crust, most likely born of industry stagnation, aggrivated health problems, multiple long ms waits, irritation with editing and the long, long LONG summer of mommies. My son is now roughly shaped like an Oompa Loompa because I couldn't do very much physically and he spent the summer like a veal in front of the tv. The evil plan is to get him a bike when we can afford it and drag both our lazy, fat asses outside for some exercise. I'll keep y'all posted on that one, since hubby outright refuses to just buy a bike from WalMart until we look around and he has no time to look around. (Why do men think that kind of attitude makes any sense? The child is turning into a ball. Seriously, at what point can he just admit he's not going to do it and let me do what can be done quickly and easily? Of course...I've been wrong before. It's gonna be a bitter pill if he's right on this one. I'll keep y'all posted.)

So, I was thinking as well, that I have to somehow find a way to set up a schedule for my house that allows me to clean it, write, feed the family and do my job. I want to earn more than I earn, but I'm lame and can't really take on another job. I keep hoping the phone will ring and I'll be able claim I've sold--but so far, that's not paying the rent. It's a lot like relying on lottery tickets to survive. You can do your best writing, do everything you need to to the best of your ability, and still not sell. I'm not bitter about that--much--but I admit, it's hard not to be resentful at times. Eight years is a long time to work at something and not have the payoff you're aiming for. At the least, it's hard to remain upbeat. Perhaps it's just that at this time of year, I'm reminded that I've completed another year and have little to show for it, careerwise. I've made great friends and have learned so much, so I can't discount the time as wasted. I just still hope for something more. Which is probably what keeps me writing.

That's probably enough prattle for y'all--provided you've kept reading this far down. :) I don't blame you if you quit. :) There's a reason I only try to think from time to time. It's scary in my head. :)

Hope y'all are having a great day!
Dee

All Quiet On The Western Front?

2005-09-14T08:45:00.000-07:00

Is it me...or is no one out there blogging much? Are we all too busy? Or have we discovered that we’re really boring? LOL!

I do the rounds of the blogs I’ve been reading and if they are blogging, I’m not really in a “commenting” kind of mood.

Am I alone in the blogsphere?

LOL, I know I’m not, but it just seems so quiet everywhere. It’s got a sort of Twillight Zone feeling. Maybe everyone is just out writing.

Snort.

All right, well, here’s hoping y’all are having more fun than me. I’ve increased the resistance on my stationary bike and consider that all the excitement I can handle for one week.

Hugs to all!
Dee

The 3rd Deadly Sin: Repetition

2005-09-13T08:53:00.000-07:00

I have to admit, this Sin is my personal favorite. Not because I like it, but because so many people try to get away with it. Primarily the more famous authors I once loved...who have either forgotten that they can write a great book or remember too well and try to write it over and over again with sometimes slightly differently named characters. It is the one of the most dissappointing sins because it’s so often overlooked for earning capability or because the author has written over fifty books and apparently, they’ve written every possible romance out there and need to start over.

No matter how much you write, no matter how long, if you love your readers--hell, if you love writing--try to avoid this sin.

It is the sin of Repetition. And it’s evil.

There are two basic types of repetition. The first, Regional Repetition, is the most insiduous, because it seeps into your writing without you really noticing. At it’s most simple level, it’s the overuse of a word. Beyond the required repeated words (said, is, and), there are a whole host of words writers come to favor that can--and should--be edited out--the most common being that, even, although, very, really. While some will argue that these words add Voice, one should remember that Voice is the spice to your writing. Overuse it and it’s inedible. Train yourself to avoid overusing any particular word. Rule of thumb--if you see the same word used more than twice in a paragraph (with exception to required is and saids), look for a way to rearrange it.

The second general type is Global Repetition. That means you will have the same character types, jobs, actions, events, places, schemes or plot from one book to the next. This is where those above authors were sucked into the evil--and in my opinion, reader-insulting--repetition sin.

Take for example, the very talented Jude Deveraux. I love her writing. She’s witty, she has a sweeping vision of historicals. Brilliant woman, really, and she had me going for so long. Remember the individuality of the James River Trilogy? The emotion of Twin of Fire/ Twin of Ice?

The Montgomerys were great...but something started happening. They were perfect. All right, we’ve seen that. Their names started repeating. Okaaaay, that happens in families. Then they all started taking on the same characteristics. I’ve lost count of the number of Kanes she’s written. Or twins. But, I could live with that. Let’s count how many times the heroine was tall, thin, pale blonde with a small chest and showgirl legs. Most of them are storytellers with smart mouths. And if they miraculously are not either of those things, they inform people that they’d be amazed what she can do with a wild rabit, herbs and a few veggies on a spit.

The worst crime is overstepping that fine line between an inside joke with the reader to simply creating a shortcut to happily ever after. Deveraux’s shortcuts of choice are “The Kiss”--strangers meet, bump into each other, and inexplicably embark on a public, body twisting kiss that would become public, body twisting sex if not reminded that they’re on a street just in time, then they decide to hate each other for the nearly violent attraction.-- and “The Family Saying”--The Taggerts are known for overpopulating the planet with identical twins, so their saying is “Marry the one who can tell the twins apart”. In her stories, a man will give up his business, spend thousands and do everything he possibly can to win the woman who thinks he’s got longer eyelashes and less body fat than his twin. (Come to think of it, I might marry a man who thinks I have less body fat...can’t blame her for that one, I guess.). These things both started off endearing...but then they started crossing continuities and that’s when I finally stopped buying her books. I’m tempted when I see her name on the shelf, but she lost my trust and I’ll probably never pick up another. She’s not the only author I won’t buy or even pick up free, for this reason.

That, in a big, fat nutshell, is why Repetition is such a sin. You break the trust of your reader. An author’s singular responsibility is to provide their reader with an enjoyable escape for the rock bottom prices of about six bucks a book (or around fifteen for trade size and twenty-two or so if you sell hardcover). To rip them off by annoying them with repeated words, taking chunks of previous books and combining them for a “new” book or worse, just writing the same book over and over again...that makes you less a creative being and more of a thief.

Readers don’t like to be robbed and very quickly, they will lose their trust in you to provide them with anything they want to pay for. Bottom line, if repetition doesn’t cost you the sale, eventually, it will cost you your reader base. How long do you think you’ll sustain a career after that?

So how do you spot it in your writing now?

Look in these crucial places:

• Sentence Structure: Are you using the same constructs too often? Take a look at your paragraphs, do you have more than one sentence in a row or even a paragraph that are punctuated the same?

Examples:

ANDS: “Jenny ran to the closet, pushed past the heavy jackets to the back and opened the safe. She quickly pulled out the jewels, closed the door and ran.”

EM DASHES: “Peter--the man she loved, the man she hated--was the only thing between her and freedom. He blocked the door, determined and angry--where was the man who’s made love to her so sweetly only hours ago?”

Check also that your sentences are not all the same length. Part of the joy and ease of reading is to have variety in length. If the writer uses streams of long sentences, a reader is tempted to skip to get to something less dense. When you create a rhythm (short, long, short, short, long), try to keep in mind that you don’t use the same rhythm over and over again.

• White Space Structure: What makes up the background of your worlds? Many authors use the same city, which can be acceptable if your characters are not all going to the same places (outside of series or contiuinties).

Does everyone live in the same fabulous house? How do you decorate them? Are you using the same things in separate homes that don’t have to do specifically with your plot?

• Thematic Structure: Do you find that your characters in multiple books have the same conflicts or realizations? Does everyone come to the same conclusion that love conquers all? Are unimpressed future in-laws behind every crime to the couple? Is it always the little rich girl and the bad boy with the heart of gold? Each book should have something different to say to the reader. There’s more than one story or one goal in you, find it, or you’re short-changing the reader as well as yourself.

• Event Structures: This one has a few places to look out for.

First, be aware that your characters aren’t doing the same thing in multiple books--even series--either literally or figuratively. I realized once that, somehow, in three books I had characters going to a cave for some reason or another. Considering I don’t like dirt or caves, this was just lazy-braining it. Another bad one was that multiple books had love scenes in a shower (thus the unfortunate nickname of “The Porceline Queen”.) I lost a sale on an otherwise not-so-bad book because the editor felt there were too many unplanned pregancies in the series. (She was right, by the way.) It won’t matter if the event has different specifics, the editors--and the readers--won’t put up with it.

A particularly painful reading experience is when there are pages are recaps...especially if it’s a recap of a recap. Be sure you’re not over-informing your reader, trying to jam a clue or information down their throats.

• Character Structure: Do your characters all look alike? Act alike? Say the same things? Have the same habits? In the same or different books? Do your heroes have the same type of job? Inspect your characters for likenesses of any kind. Make your mantra: Be an Individual. Even related books should have characters with different looks, thoughts, histories, drives, motivations, dreams and desires. No matter how closely linked your characters might be from book to book, how they grew up or where, keeping them unique keeps your stories real instead of rejected.

Next Week: The 2nd Deadly Sin: Phraseology

Five Friday Tidbits

2005-09-09T17:26:00.000-07:00

Okay, lets start with the obvious:

1) The Boy Is Back In School!!! Thank you, God! I even had cramp reduction. I'm now looking into seeing if there's a way to train my body into having all bathroom requirements made while he's gone.

2) I know that I've been blathering on about my website, but I can now officially (damn PCs, included) upgrade it from "craptastic" to "marginally professional"! Changed the color scheme, discovered the power of CSS and even have all my excerpts properly formatted. Now to write DECENT crap to put in it!

3) I'm not sick. Pet is. And while she denies it's bronchitis, not one of us here has gotten more than a sniffle. (Since no one can dare call me healthy, this is miraculous.)

4) I finally connected emotionally with the heroine of the book I'm editing. I see her. *makes gesture of my eye to her eye* She's not getting away from ME again! HA! Suddenly, it all looks like it's going to get done. QUICKLY! Woohoo!

5) Little sister is pregnant. She's happy about it. (I asked, prior to congratulating.) I must admit, I had a brief flash of jealousy--I'm human. I had a less brief bout of irritation when she chose the announcement time to remind me that it's much smarter to have your children close together, so they aren't lonely. (If I got preggers tonight, Moo would still be 8 by the time the kid came out.) But, she's happy and more importantly, I didn't kill her. Maybe the hormone wave is receding? WooHOO!

Oh, and gang, if you go through a little Dee-pression, you'll find my Belfry Blog up tomorrow morning! (Click on the sidebar link to take you right to it!)

Have a great weekend!